"I think I've changed my mind, let's just go home Jonathan," I pouted, hitting the gas and heading back in the direction of the Byers residence "You don't have to do that," Jonathan insisted as he muttered like he did.. "Ok well now I'm not hungry," I lied, looking dead ahead. "You're upset with me," Jonathan had finally concluded as if the signals I was sending were not enough, "Look at that, you're a genius!" I cheered, glaring at the road in front of us. I almost dared him to continue coming to obvious conclusions. "Sarah," he sighed, rolling down his window. "What are Fridays Jonathan?" I asked as I clenched the steering wheel so hard my knuckles turned white. "Fridays are sacred," he sighed, repeating everything we've ever told ourselves up to this point. "Apparently not to everyone," I responded, tucking hair behind my ear and pulling into the Byers driveway. "You know I'm not sleeping tonight and I don't like to be in the house without Will," Jonathan said wearily, eying the house with so much disgust it almost makes me hate my childhood second home. "You are being ridiculous, with Will and your mom gone we can listen to loud music, plug all the lights in, and make our own pizzas, it doesn't have to be a sad place. It only is if you let it continue to be one," I said, attempting to look at it in a different light.
I climbed out of the car and put on my best smile for Joyce. To my surprise, it wasn't Joyce. It was our two favorite lovebirds from the Wheelers. "Hey, we decided to take you up on that offer to hang out," Nancy reasoned as she nearly skipped to the door before I could get there. "Yeah about that...maybe tonight wasn't the best night guys," Jonathan stammered, unlocking the door around the sweet girl standing in front of it. While she is courageous, she definitely didn't stick around for very long after the Hero work was done. As Steve approached us I glanced down at his hand, reaching for Nancy's as they went in the house and I suddenly wanted to throw up. "Woah, are you ok?" Jonathan asked as I spun around to the bushes, fighting against the gagging sensation in my throat. I felt his hand pull my hair back as I doubled over, losing whatever I have eaten that day. My frizzy hair fell back around my face as I stood up. "Yeah I'm fine, but I'm gonna go nap or something. Wake me if anything happens with Will," I muttered, pushing past him and the two teenagers standing in the kitchen and straight to Jonathan's room.
As I kicked off my shoes and took out the spare pajamas under Jon's bed, I could hear everything happening on the other side of the house. "Is she ok?" Steve asked, letting concern for someone other than Nancy or Jonathan slip into his voice. It was a strange thing to hear it about me. "Not exactly. She's all worked up about you guys," Jonathan admitted and the only thing keeping me from getting angry and leaving was the thought of Will needing me. "I'll just wait to leave until Joyce is home. If Joyce comes home, of course, you never know what'll happen at this time of night." I whispered to myself. "We can leave if it would help her out," Nancy offered and I saw all the lights click on in the hall. "Turn off the lights, not now, turn them off," I muttered, not mustering up enough strength to yell at Nancy right now. I quickly changed, throwing on a pair of Jonathan's pajama pants and my own white tank top and reemerging into the source of my storm. I tie my hair up as I roll my eyes at easy laughter, wishing it wasn't hers.
"Thanks for this pretty boy," I said sarcastically, taking the cigarette from behind his ear and snatching up Joyce's lighter from the table. I quickly lit it and took a long drag, staring at Jon the whole time. "Sarah stop," Jonathan groaned, taking it from me and putting it in the ashtray. "Jonathan stop," I whined, throwing my hands up. "Stop what Sarah? Stop protecting you?" he asked, crossing his arms and staring me down. "Protecting me? What kind of bull crap is that? I have to protect you from yourself constantly. Your behaviors are destructive and the only way I can get you to feel ok is when we go see her, but I'm torn between making you happy and helping you move on!" I screamed, raising my voice and wanting to shove him, hard, only to wake up him up and drag him into the reality that he refuses to be a part of. "Then stop! We don't need you here!" Jonathan yells at me, "Go smoke your cigarettes and live in that house with your awful father which is better than mine anyway. I don't need you here and neither does Will!" I did the only thing I could think to do, I backhanded him and felt all the pain in my hand. "You are an idiot Jonathan Byers, the sooner you realize Nancy will never love you, the sooner you will realize how you much you need me!" I yelled back, not holding the tears in any longer.I stormed out, leaving my jacket and shoes and the rest of my belongings in the only home I have ever been proud of. As soon as I slammed my car door shut, I remembered my keys still laying on the counter. That's when the sobbing really started, the kind that makes my lungs shake and my head hurt. I slammed my fists against the wheel, not caring that I would look absolutely crazy to anyone approaching.
Now, Jonathan has just chased me to the car, slamming open my door. "You forgot your keys," Jonathan says as he slides into the passenger seat, still looking utterly distraught and upset with me. But instead of throwing them at me, he carefully drops them on the dashboard. "I didn't mean it," he says, taking one of my hands in his and moving closer. "I need you more than I'd like to admit and so does Will," he says, pulling me against his chest as I begin to sob more violently, shaking with every breath. "Shh, shhh, you're ok," he mutters, rubbing my back and holding me tight. "You were right, but I need some time to get over Nancy, it's not going to be an overnight thing and you need to stop expecting it to be," Jonathan says, laying his cheek down on top of my head. He knows when I need to be told the truth and I am unquestionably thankful for it. Even if it means that he is admitting I was in the wrong "Nancy and Steve are going back to Nancy's, we're going to have our sacred Friday night," Jonathan says, going to climb out of the car. "Wait," I mutter, collecting myself a tiny bit. "Yes?" he asks, sitting back down. Now I have two options, I kiss him right now and accept a role as a rebound or as rejected, or I ask him to sit with me for just a minute longer. "Can you sit with me for just a minute or two longer?" I ask, closing my eyes and sighing in disappointment with myself. "Of course," he says, tucking me back against his chest and holding me close. "Have I ever told you that I love you?" he asks, pulling me closer to him. "I love you too Jonathan," I murmur, nestling even closer to him.
