A Necessary Struggle: Fall Semester

Part 58

      Alyssa jumped at a chance to go snowboarding. Samuel didn't have to twist her arm at all. So, when Trevor gave them the passes of the ski resort his family always had season passes too she stopped unpacking her bags and jumped in the passenger seat the late model Land Rover Samuel idled in front of the house. She figured it was Trevor's mom car since the flowery aroma of rose and lavender bloomed in the trapped air. Samuel typed the address he scribbled on a snowman notepad he found stuck to the fridge door. Once the route was mapped and the electronic woman started to speak she snapped in her seatbelt as Samuel eased out of the driveway.

      The estimated travel time was twenty-eight minutes but the way Samuel's hands held the steering wheel like vice grips and his foot was light as a feather as it pushed down on the gas pedal, it took them longer than expected. When the car hit a patch of ice and skating across the two-lane road, barely missing an approaching sedan Samuel had to pull on the side of the road so they both could catch their breaths. It was seventy-two minutes later they reached Snowmass. Two and a half hours later, after getting gear and equipment they were finally on the ski lift riding the rope up to the mountain.

     They sat in silence for a while watching the enormous snow-cloaked tree slide pass them as their hover over the freshly fallen powder.

    "Look!" Alyssa's voice was muffled as she spoke through the cover. She pointed to a man in yellow rolling down the mountain like a bowling ball taking out a few bystanders that were in his path. "That's you!"

     Sam laughed pushing her arm down, "Naw!" He pulled the goggles off his eyes letting the arctic wind blast him in the face. "I've done this before. That's you falling on your ass plowing down innocent children."

     "Probably." She could see herself toppling over like a wedding cake on a shaky table. She'd never snowboarded before. Sure she'd been skiing but her with her family when she was little but that was on the kiddie slopes. She'd never tried to balance her weight on one board while sliding down the steep incline of a mountain. Her nerves started to set in the higher the lift climb. "Gotta say, though...I'm a little scared."

     "Pssh." Samuel jabbed her in the shoulder but she could barely feel it through all the layers she was wearing. "You're a fighter, Sasaki."

       "That couldn't be farther from the truth." She was grateful for the gloves because if her naked hands were on the metal bar locking them in the lift, her sweating hands would be stuck like tape on wrapping paper.

      "You went through hell this year and you survived."

        "I tried to kill myself." Alyssa blurted out feeling relieved to confess it to someone. Samuel didn't say a word he just looked at her with high eyebrows like a clown just jumped out of a closet yelling Gotcha! "It was the night Quinn got arrested for assaulting Jacob. I was in his apartment alone. I took three of his Vicodin. I drifted to sleep thinking the last thing I was going to see was that Target commercial that played every commercial break but I just woke up late in the evening." She shrugged like it was no big deal.

     "You tried to kill yourself," Samuel repeated in disbelief. "Why didn't you say anything? Get help before it got that far."

      "I did." She watched the cloud of smoke pour from her mouth as she spoke. "And Quinn got arrested and put on academic probation." She sniffed as the cold air burned her nostrils. "I on academic probation too."

    "Cause you've been skipping class." Samuel clarified.

      Alyssa nodded once. "Failed chemistry, Infectious diseases, and Anatomy. Got a 'D' in Ancient Civilizations, though." She half smiled.

    "So what are you going to do?" He shifted his body toward her shaking the lift.

    Alyssa grabbed the bar, holding tight like she was preparing for sudden impact. When the lift steadied to a slow rock to started back talking. "I told my parents. We talked about it."

    "Really!" Samuel tone lowered an octave.

      She saw the look of horror on his face. It was the same one Harmony had the first semester when she told her parents she changed her major from pre-med to pre-law. Alyssa remembered it because it was freshman Parent's day and she had lunch with them and her parents.

      "It wasn't bad." She sniffed again but this time it was because Jack Frost was nipping at her nose. It was her mom's wailing tears and her dad's utter dismay. "I told them the truth. About the rape, the suicide attempt, filing charges against Jacob...everything."

      "So what now." Samuel lurched forward as the lift began to slow as it reached the apex of the mountain.

     "They think I should transfer to another school...maybe Berkley." She sat up preparing to get off the lift and place her feet back on stable ground. "Get a fresh start."