My hearts been waiting for me drop.
Not dead but that need for that dead stop feeling. Beating, not feeling yet still concscience to the liquor.
Mentally alone.
Physically detached but I'm emotional aware.
Mixing the drugs & her all at the same time while still making visual images of the pain.
You see what I see or is my vision too blurry ?
I've been drawing self protraits where you can see me ticking in the frame. I always wished I could paint so I try to really hard with these words.
I don't know where to start really, I'm just writing to write really.
The feels of the late night & those dark feelings, laying down staring at her ceiling.
Somewhere between in control & raging.
I'm feeling things I never understood how to feel. In the mix of teaching myself how to deal with the moments that weren't forever.
Heavy on my scale but I outweighed the libra, with this I'm in love like this was my first kiss.
These words I'm always giving you, how you take them from me like this shit wasn't a gift.
I understand but I guess it's like something's they say aren't for comprehending rather than understanding.
Like the layout of the words I'm constantly flowing. Always maintaining just somehow he keeps on going.
I don't even believe anymore not speaking on myself just you.
The viewers, the listeners, the lairs & even the teachers.
Everything's in question & right now I need answers.
I'm hot, not in the street I've been stressing in the kitchen.
Trying to cook up lines but I'm losing my touch in these verses.
My tongues in knots & my stomach is empty.
Everything just taste like death.
I don't know who to call or who's calling. I'm pacing & my breaths are heavy..
- Onesimus G.S. Gayemen Jr. ( Prime )
