Short Sweet Stories

Seeing him again

Some say I was chosen.

That all of us were chosen to be in this particular interest.

I don't exactly believe that.
The reason? I was the offspring.
The belief of something, passed down 3 generations.
My siblings, oh they believed and understood it in the snap of a finger.
But I didn't.

Growing up, I was surrounded by this belief, it was my life. Not that I complained a lot, it gave me a lot of good.
Most of my family and friends entertained this belief too, so naturally I went along with it, doing what I thought I had to do.

For years, people painted a picture of this different type of living. They said it was everything, but only if you believed.

I wanted that.

Just one problem stood in my way.

I didn't believe it.

***

I've known a boy. For a very long time.
This boy, I bet him because of this belief.
It's how I got to know him. Grow close to him.
Part of me liked him.
But at the same time, a part of me was drifting away from the religious life style.

I knew that if I left the religion, then I'd have to leave everything behind. Including this boy.

I started pulling away.
Each day, growing less responsive, less active in the belief.

Of course, it pained me to see the panic in my friends and families eyes, I knew they loved me and wanted me to stay.

I couldn't lie any longer though, it was either the religion, with the loving support, but fake happiness....or I could leave, have a harder life, but be more free...maybe more happy.

The cold part of me drew the boy closer. Be the damsel in distress. Make him believe that I needed him to save me.

Then I left.

Abruptly, I stood up. Packed my bag, dropped the belief, waved goodbye to everything and everyone, and left, just in hope of a little less pretending and more real happiness.

***

It had been 6 months since the last time I had looked into those familiar brown eyes.

His tall frame frozen in front of me, his hands shoved deeply in his pockets, his lips parted slightly in shock, the once warm and cozy eyes swirling with undecidable emotions.
He was completely oblivious to our surroundings, but I wasn't.

I cocked my head to the side, a thick strand of hair falling in front of my eyes.
Puffing it away, I continued the stare down between us.

"Hello you" I mused, not caring to cover up the slight smile I was carrying.
His eyes flickered, and he sighed, gulping.
"Hey" he almost whispered.

"You look like you've seen a ghost" I said, forcing my breathing to remain steady as the thundering feeling inside my chest quickened.

A sarcastic chuckle escaped him, and he looked away from me.
"Feels like a kinda have"

Sucking a deep breath of air in, I pushed down the hurt that flashed through me.
He must of noticed it, as he once again sighed and muttered "sorry"

Putting that behind me, I casually asked, "how have you been?"

Casting his eyes over me, he shrugged.
"Fine. Nothing much has changed"

I knew those words were to spite me, taking the hurt inside of him and lashing it out on the girl who caused it.
I didn't react. I just took it.

I nodded.

I could see the struggle in him, seeing me again after so long.
It affected me too.
Going from seeing someone every week of your life to no communication at all is undeniably difficult, especially if you view that person very fondly.

His left arm came up, and he rubbed the nape of his neck, his bicep popping.
Guilt rose up in me, I knew that he always went to the gym when he was stressed. The change of physic was obvious to how difficult he had taken the change.

A pained expression crossed his face.
"I'm sorry, I- I can't do this." He gulped, squeezing his eyes shut.
"I can't stand here after you disappeared, and just act like I'm not affected by it. By...You! I've tried so damn hard to push away how hurt I've felt after you left but I just can't. I can't lie to you, I miss you. And God, I want you back. So bad. It's not just me, it's everyone. It's not the same. There's just this empty black hole everywhere, and everyone can feel it, that's what you left behind! And I just... I can't deal with thinking that your gone. It hurts so bad. Come back. I beg you come back. I-" he trailed off, out of breath.

The crowded streets bustled around us, oblivious to how much this boy just broke my heart.

A sob rose, but I refused to let him see how much seeing him affected me.
Instead, I gave him a wobbly smile, my eyes pooling with tears.
He stared at me desperately, but all I did was shrug. "Nothing much has changed" I quoted.
He winced, but I felt no accomplishment.

All I could do was turn around and walk away, releasing the breath I'd been holding and letting the tears streak my face, walking away from my everything, still in hope that one day I'd be happy again.