Origin Stories - Marauders Era - ATQ Contingency

Chapter 8: Christmas and Secrets

The next day, I sent a letter to my mum telling her that I would be staying at Hogwarts for Christmas. She wasn't happy, but she understood my reasons.

That's how Sirius and I ended up being the only students in the Gryffindor Tower over the holidays. Knowing that, I was doubly glad that I'd decided to stay with him. 

We had lots of fun over the few weeks that we had to ourselves. We hung out with Peeves. He was surprisingly friendly towards us. It was probably because of Sirius' known prankster status. We read in the library together. Sirius was smarter than most people gave him credit for. I think the most fun part was when we planned pranks. Of course, most of them would be targeted at our friends and the few Slytherins who had taken it upon themselves to torment us. I didn't know if we would actually go through with any of these, but I hoped we would.

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Christmas Eve was a surreal experience for me. I'd never not spent it with my family. The girls dorms felt too empty. At around eleven, I crept down to the common room. I hoped that going to the place that I slept with Remus once a month would help me not feel so lonely.

When I got there, I discovered that I was not the only one. Sirius seemed to have had the same idea. He was sitting on a couch near the fire, watching the embers slowly die. He flinched as I sat beside him.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

Sirius shook his head, his long hair falling over his face, hiding his eyes.

"I don't know." His voice quaked. "Everything. My whole life has just been messed up. Like a whirlwind has torn through it. I've been bottling it up. Keeping it inside me. And I don't know how long I can take it."

I grabbed his hand, forcing him to look me in the eye. "So tell me. Tell me everything."

And he did. He told me. He told me how his family was before Hogwarts. How they all treated him like a prince and fed him pureblood propaganda. He told me about how his uncle Capricorn told him the very opposite very time he saw him. He told me about what his home was like this summer. How his parents had changed. How he didn't feel safe there anymore.

He told me about his cousins. How Andromeda had been thrown out of the family for marrying a metamorphagus. He told me about Bellatrix, who was already a fanatical follower of Voldemort. And Narcissa, who was in the year above us and was apparently not that bad but wouldn't go against the family like Andromeda did.

He told me about Regulus. How he was so afraid for him. Afraid that he'd be pressured into doing something that he couldn't come back from. Afraid that he'd be thrown in Azkaban for it. Afraid that he'd die.

By the end of it, Sirius was in tears. I didn't know what to say. There was nothing I could say. So, I just wrapped my arms around him and let him fall asleep.

Christmas morning brought many surprises. The Christmas tree that was tucked in a corner of the common room was stacked high with presents. I laughed at Sirius' surprise and delight when found that he had quite a few presents of his own.

James, Sirius, Peter and I had all gotten him gifts. As well as my mum, dad, aunty and brother. I made a mental note to thank a Josh later for it.  Perhaps the most surprising present was the one from Regulus. Sirius looked like he was about to cry as he opened the envelope and unwrapped the gift.

Christmas celebrations seemed to last all day. The Great Hall only had one, long table that was constantly full of food. Dumbledore had scheduled snowball fights and had charmed snowmen to walk around the grounds. It was brilliant.

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The first thing James said after he got back from Christmas break was, "Evans looks quite nice, doesn't she?"