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I used to tell myself that one day, when I was old enough to be legally on my own, that I would met someone. I would met someone nice, and sweet; someone that wouldn't lay a finger on me if I didn't want him to. But now...now I'm tainted. He wouldn't want me if he knew. He might think he might, but if he finds out... he'd leave me in a heartbeat.

But he wanted Destiny. If not for a minute. And she's not a virgin, either, so he might not care about that. But I cared. I cared that I wasn't me anymore. I was someone my father wanted me to be, someone my sister told everyone I was. So maybe, just maybe, he would still want me when he found out that I was ruined.

No-if! If he found out. IF. I definitely wasn't going to tell him, even if I could. I wasn't going to tell anyone. No one would even begin to understand my life. Especially lately. No one would understand. I didn't want anyone to understand, because I couldn't handle anyone trying to comfort me, or tell me it was going to be okay. It wouldn't. My life was ruined. It was ruined by a guy my father sold me to. I was going to go to college as soon as I graduated high school. I was going to find a guy, get my own apartment and marry a great guy that actually loved me. A guy nothing like my father, and everything like Josh. I was going to have kids, and leave my old life behind me. I was going to get over my fears, and my husband would help me do it. I would talk to him, and kiss him. I would do everything with him, and I would love every minute of it.

But that was all gone now. It was almost impossible for me. At this rate, I was never going to get out of the house. He was going to keep me here; against my will if he needed to. I was never going to get out of here, and if I did, it wouldn't be a good thing. I was never going to experience a real life. I was never going to get a job, or have a kid. I was never, ever going to have a normal life. No matter how hard I tried, I would not be able to forget this year, let alone that day. I wanted to look back at my first and smile, but now when I look back, I'll shutter and probably even cry. I'll never live it down, and it's all because of my father. I wanted to know what life would be like without him. What would've happened if he hadn't been my father, or if I had had a different mom, or no sister? What would've happened if I hadn't meant J or Josh? Would the same things have happened, or would Destiny just have kept ignoring me and insulting me behind my back?

Oh, whatever, it didn't matter. What's done is done, and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it. There was no point in talking about ifs. It wouldn't change anything, anyways.

I was alert as I traveled down the hallways, glancing from side to side until I came to the last corner until the hall that my locker was on. I glimpsed around the corner, finding Jake and Destiny right by my locker. Of course. I sighed, relaxing my shoulder against the wall and staring at them, willing them to go away.

"They ain't gonna leave, ya know." I jumped, spinning around to find myself face to face with Josh's stunning smirk. "I overhead them talkin'. They're plannin' on ditchin' the rest a the day."

I sighed again, crossing my arms over my chest and leaning back against the wall. He held out his hand, his grin widening. "But I can escort you over there." I couldn't help the corner of my lip tipping up just a little, but I placed my hand in his. His fingers closed around mine and pulled me around the corner. I repositioned the bag on my shoulder and stared at the tiles on the ground as we walked past the couple and towards my locker. Destiny scoffed as I walked by, flipping her hair over her shoulder and leaning farther into Jake.

Josh stood next to my locker as I switched out my books, impatiently drumming his fingers on the lockers. His eyes glared in the couple's direction, almost as if he was asking Jake to make a move. I glanced over my shoulder to find Jake staring back, defensive. He dipped his head down next to Destiny's ear. She glanced to Josh, and then to me, and scowled. "Alright," I saw her mouth. He let go of her hand and turned on his heels, strolling towards me. I stiffened, and so did Josh, standing up straight.

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