the stars

iii.

he was sitting next to his neighbour darla, that afternoon, picking at the pebbles that conjured up his driveway.

on these specific afternoons, when gus didn't know what he felt for darla, he busied himself doing the only thing he could think of. and that thing mainly consisted of throwing those pebbles toward the mailbox a mere two metres away.

he liked sitting next to darla. he liked it so much he worried if she could tell by reading his mind.

the fact that the two sat in complete silence, was, to say the least, daunting and possibly made the situation worse.

she would always begin conversation, something about school, or the car that recently drove past gus' house, or how rodney from fifth grade said that he wanted to marry her, but gus could never find the words to share his thoughts on any of the topics.

the way he was accustomed to these things stayed clear enough for those willing to observe. his father mentioned on many nights that if gus didn't know how to speak, then he had better learn how to, and quickly.

but as gus watched the next few cars zoom past and how darla's yellow cotton dress billowed in the breeze, he couldn't help but embrace the fact that this was who he was, and if he had any chance of learning how to speak to people, it was a bare minimum.

his head tuned back in to what she was saying.

"-and my mum said she would-"

out and back in again, like a run-down film playing in his mind.

"-sunday, or maybe monday that week, i think-"

maybe this was his problem. maybe he just needed to pay more attention to people.

"-so do ya wanna come or?"

"huh?" he didn't intend to let such a small word escape his lips but it was too late to take it back, and now he had caused himself a heavy load of somewhat remorse.

darla's expression hardened before she said, "y-you weren't listening?"

he was quiet. too quiet. so quiet even the wind was jealous. and now, all he can distinctly remember from that day forward was when she turned her head in disappointment, stood up and steadied her wobbly legs, and then took off down the pathway to the gate, where she hopped on her bike and peddled away.

she was like the breeze, there . . . and then gone.

he watched as the stars fell from her bike.