Can't think of a cool title sorry

I dont lay awake at night

The night was dark, and she was alone. There was no sound to be heard.
Pure silence. Nights like that, in which silence was so violent were the ones she disliked the most.
She felt alone, even if she knew her brother was just a room away and so were her parents. But she couldn't wake them up in the middle of the night. It would've had also been ridiculous. She was seventeen.
It was dark, out there. It's not like she even wanted to leave her room. The silence was overwhelming and seemed to dig his way into her soul. She was alone.
Anxiety grew up inside her, tightening the knot around her stomach.
She could smile during the day, laugh and distract herself all she wanted. But at night, her thoughts never left her alone. At night, she was lonely.
She wanted to cry, but she had so much over the years she wasn't sure she could anymore.
Even crying was so tiring lately.
If she cried, maybe she would exhausts herself enough to fall asleep, but she knew this wasn't the case.
It was going to be a long night, she knew it.
Silence started embracing her with his cold arms.
Not sure if she wanted to cover herself better with her sheets. She wouldn't want to bother the silence.

It was dark, and cold, and lonely.
All she needed, all the wanted, was for someone to hug her anxiety away, to calm her down and make her feel ok again.
And not only someone.
She knew exactly who she wished to be there.
She missed him.
And yet, they never kissed, or shared a bed or something.
But she could only picture him being there with her.
She wasn't sure he even felt something for her. He was always so quiet it was hard to picture his thoughts.
But when he touched her, hugged her or caressed her, his touch was always so soft and warm, his voice so calm and helpful, she would only want him.

She was aware the last thing she should do was to have comforting fantasies about the Gleeful boy but, in her own defense, she didn't choose to fall in love with him.
It was all Dipper's fault.
He shouldn't have comforted her, touched her, played with her hair, looked her in the eyes.
He made her feel loved and she fell for him.

Gideon said he only wanted the journal, and that she should stay away from him.

When she came back home after meeting Dipper, he bursted out that he saw them and told her to go get her heart broken.
After that, Pacifica had to choose between him and her brother.

She choose Gideon.
He's her brother, he's always gonna be there, and she didn't want to ruin their bond.

While Dipper? Well, she's madly in love with him. But does he?

She made the right choice. She knew it was like that.

But damn, did she missed him.

______________

It's late at night, and I'm anxious too.
Probably I won't like this one when I'll read it again in the morning.
Have you ever noticed how you feel different about everything from night to day?
Sorry if it's feelsy but well, it is a late night scenario after all
Hope you all have better sleep than me
Night