Broken || a. i.

Chapter 9: Post-Concert Depression

I'm sorry I haven't updated in a month. I was taking a break from social media. I've deleted my instagram's, so don't try to follow them anymore. But anyway, I have got to move this story along. I spent like, 6 chapters on one night lol. So! Vote and comment after, please!

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Ashton:

I woke up Friday morning in the hotel room. Calum was in the bed next to mine, Luke was with him. Michael must still be in the adjoining room. I got up and grabbed a Red Bull from the fridge. I walked into Michael's room and he was up and on his phone. He was laying on the bed, while he held the phone above him.

"Hey, Mikey." I said. My voice was husky from sleeping, and hoarse from the show last night. Mikey jumped and his phone fell in his face.

"Fuck you, Ashton." He said as he rubbed his bruising skin. I laughed and pulled out my own phone from my pocket.

I had a million notifications from Instagram, about 2000 new likes and 30 DMs. I rolled my eyes and I opened each. Some were nudes, others just faces of our fans. Those were the ones I was happy to see, even though I couldn't reply to any of them. Occasionally, you would would get a picture of yourself. 4 or 5 DMs were from the show last night. I laughed a video of when my drumsticks broke. and snickered as a picture of Michael came up. He was in the middle of a sneeze. I screenshotted it for use later.

I checked my texts. I had one from my mom. It said, "Good luck tonight!! I love you! xo" It must have been from yesterday. I texted her a quick thanks.

I had one other text. It was from Emily. It said, "Thanks for such a fun night! I hope I'll see you again soon." I smiled.

"Love note from Emily?" Michael asked with a smirk on his face.

I blushed.

"No. Just a text." I mumbled.

I typed back, "I had a great time too. You should come into the city today, if you can. :)"

I sent it feeling nervous. I had never felt this way about anyone else. It was so weird.

"Good morning!" Calum yelled from the doorway.

"Shut up, Calum!" I heard Luke yell. He was always so exhausted from the shows and his schoolwork and the studio time. I felt bad for the kid, but he got extra vacation time because he's not a legal adult in Australia. The lucky bastard was going back for a couple of days this week.

After Luke finally got up we showered, got dressed, and went out to find breakfast.

There was a Starbucks not far from the hotel, so we went there.

I ordered a coffee and a piece of cinnamon coffee cake and found a table in the back. The boys followed my lead and tried to walk to the table without drawing attention. But Calum, the dope, nearly took down an entire table.

"Sorry! Sorry!" he kept apologizing until Luke dragged him away. We all glared at him as he sat down.

"What happened to being discrete?" I said.

"Oh well." he shrugged his shoulders and took a sip of his coffee. "What are we doing today, lads?"

"I was thinking we could go into Boston Common or-" My phone buzzed.

I had a reply from Emily.

It read,

"You should rest today, we have all week to hang out. But, if you really want to... I guess I could come."

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Emily:

I sent the message, hoping he would want me to come to Boston.

"Emily," Kate's mom poked her head into the room where me, Lindsey, and Kate were all sprawled out on the floor.

"Yes?" I replied and looked up.

"Your mom will be here in 20 minutes to pick you up, okay?" she said.

"Yup. Thank you so much." I said.

"No problem." I heard her close the door as I got up and stretched. I started picking up my stuff off the floor and put in my over night bag.

"Last night was so fun." I said.

"Yeah." Kate sighed, remembering.

"Ashton asked me to come into Boston today." I said, almost in a whisper.

"Oh my god really?!" Kate squealed.

"Yeah. Do you think I should go?" I asked. "I don't want to seem desperate."

"You won't." Lindsey replied, still half-asleep.

"Do it!" Kate urged. I heard my mom honk the car. I grabbed my bag, put on my shoes, and left the room, calling a 'thanks' behind me.

I walked out into the cool, April morning air. I opened the door into our old Honda and hopped in the passenger seat.

"How was the concert?" my mom asked as she pulled out of Kate's long driveway.

"It was pretty amazing. I got 4/4 signatures and..." I trailed off. I knew she wouldn't approve of me hanging out with the boys- never mind kissing the oldest member in the band.

"And...?" she said, skeptical. She could tell something else had happened.

"Ashton happened. He noticed my, uh, scars and brought me and Kate and Lindsey backstage and we hung out until show time and he kissed me and he showed me the stage and the stands-" I went off blabbing the rest of the story as I remember when she found out about my scars.

•

It was a Saturday in January. We were cleaning out my drawers and in my top left one, I had totally forgot about my blades, not having to use them since September. She was going through my sock drawer when she found the red bundle. She undid it and found the blades.

"Emily. What are these?" she asked me looking up. She had tears in her eyes.

"They're... They're... I'm so sorry." I went over and put my arms around her as the tears spilled over.

"Why?"

"I was lonely. I was having a tough time coping through Dad leaving. I'm so sorry." She kissed my forehead.

"It's okay. Can I see your wrists?" she pulled away and held out her hands. I turned my palms so that they were facing the ceiling.

"14?" She had counted them, the scars.

"Yes. It happened over the course of two weeks- from the end of August to mid-September. But I'm okay now. I promise."

"I believe you. But I think you should go to counseling. For a little while."

•

"He kissed you?" My mom nearly hit another car.

"Yeah. I mean. Yeah." A smile spread across my face.

"He's not using you is he?" she sounded concerned, I would be too, if my 15-year-old daughter was kissed by a 20 year old boy she had never met.

"No. Of course not. He kissed me because I was on the verge of a panic attack." I said.

"Oh. That makes sense." She sounded like she was trying to convince herself.

"And he asked if I wanted to come into Boston today, show him around, because he's staying here all week, and..." I trailed off, prepared for the worst.

"Do you need a ride?" she asked and smiled at me.

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SHE LOOKS SO PERFECT IS PERFECT OKAY? OKAY. I'm so sorry for not updating but I'm going to try and update more.

120 votes and 20 comments?

Emily 💕