Hot For Teacher... (BoyxBoy)

Chapter Ten- You don't have to help me..

Song to the side is Dramamine by Modest Mouse --------------------------->

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(Kellin)

    I run my wavering fingers through my hair as I turn the heater on high, not sure where to start dealing with this situation right now besides making him as painless as he can until we can get to my house so I can see if he needs hospitalization or just some heavy bandaging.

    I see his phone sitting on the seat next to him where he's cowered against the car door looking into his lap or at his wrists, seeming to want to just remove the jacket from the cuts and let himself bleed out. That's not going to happen but I slowly grab the phone, plugging it into the chord that plays music through my car speakers. And hoping that his music can help him stop whimpering every few seconds from fear, shame and pain I pull up the music player and play the first song on shuffle. Dramamine by Modest Mouse.

    Though he still looks,i like he wants to jump out of the car, just like before, the music seems to calm how badly he's shaking even if he's still shaking pretty bad.

    Through his watery eyes.. It almost seems as if he's emotionless, he seems too blank, but I know he's freaking out because he's crying and if you look close enough you can see the pain and anger in between sharp gasps of breath.

    I clench my teeth. Who the fuck could do this?! Who could take this boy, this already hurting inside boy and make him feel even worse about himself. That morning after I had sex with Matthew, I should have just held him close to me and let whatever happened happen. I should have just laid there letting him bask in the warm rays of morning sunlight seeping through the blinds and kept him near. It's too late though, to have him with me like that.. I've already f*cked him over once.. I knew how fragile kids in that state of mind can be, I knew that if I did that to him it would make him resent himself even more, I knew it because I've felt that before.

    That doesn't mean I can't help keep him safe, and that doesn't mean I can't try to be on speaking terms with him. I know probably the only reason he's accepting my help right now is because he would definitely not be okay physically if he didn't. I was literally the only one outside that could have come across him..

    "Matthew.. Who did this to you?..." I ask softly.

    He stares at me like a lost puppy and shakes his head from side to side.

    "I can't.. I-I can't. He doesn't matter, I j-just want to forget about this again.."

    "Again? What are you talking about, has this happened before?.." He bites his lip, realizing he said too much as always, but knowing that he can't take it back.

    He replies, "..J-Just once before by the same guy.. When I was th-thirteen.. I got over it. But I-I guess him seeing me in the condition he was in made him.. Want to do it a-again?.. He w-was on Cocaine, so he wouldn't.. f-finish for a very long t-time.. That's normal I was told. It had to be o-ver two hours.. Holy fuck I d-don't want to think about this anymore. H-He's my dad's friend okay?.. H-His name is Chase.."

    He closes his eyes and leans his head back on the head rest, the purple bruises and.. hickeys on his exposed neck contrasting with his pale skin. Something as beautiful as Matthew shouldn't have to be this broken...

    I think, and relay all the Chase's that I know in my head.. Only one that lived here.. He's a junkie drug addict who seems like if he had the upper hand... He would take advantage of Matthew if he liked him.. That guy's a bastard.