secret - sm (rewriting)

goddess || five

Angela

Last night was...

Amazing

I never thought that I would ever feel that same feeling with another after Shawn. I was so empty after I broke up with him. But Cameron, he fixed me. Last night he treated me like, and I quote his exact word "Goddess". No, I don't love him, I like him a lot. I'm not ready for a relationship and he's respectful of my decision. He told me he's willing to wait for me. Cam's so sweet, it melts my heart. He filled that void inside me, that very big piece of my heart Shawn had taken, Cameron is slowly fixing my heart. I fell thrilled to be myself again.

My thoughts of Shawn do haunt me, the old memories when we were kids, when he asked me out-Jesus Angela stop. I looked at Cam who was peacefully sleeping right next to me and I smiled. I combed his hair with my hands softly.

I whispered "Thank you for making me happy again." So he wouldn't wake up.

"You're welcome princess." He said with a morning voice.

He heard that. I'm so embarrassed. Heat flushed my cheeks, they turned crimson red. Dammit Angela be careful.

"What do you wanna do today?" I asked.

"Round two?" He smirked

I nodded and he went up to kiss me.

Shawn

Today was my concert here in LA. I just finished rehearsing. I'm thinking of inviting Angela and Camer- I just can't say his name. I was I'm pain I just want to see her, before I go.

I got my phone out of my pocket then I dialed her phone.

1 ring

2 rings

3 rings

4 rings

"Hello?" Angela's sweet voice rang thorough my phone. But she was panting, breathing really hard.

"It's me Angela, Shawn I was wondering if you and C-Cameron would come to my concert in LA before I go?" I asked nervously.

I still heard her heavy breathing through the phone. She was quietly talking to someone.

"Cam I'm on the phone wait, baby mmh stop it!" She laughed. Angela thought I didn't hear but I knew what she was exactly doing.

Having sex. Angela why do you have to do this to me.

"Yeah Shawn sure but we don't have tickets."

"I will message the eTickets right now."

"Shawn yeah I'll see you I'm b-busy." Her breathing hitched the
n she hung up.

I was pretty excited but upset. Didn't she realize me, her ex was on the phone? I heard her moan but I didn't do that. Rage is filling my body. I texted Angela her tickets, the best tickets. Only the best for her.

I continued to rehearse until the stadium doors opened.

The show was ready to begin.

Angela

We walked in the big stadium hand in hand. I was hoping nobody would notice me and Cam. I just wanted to have a fun day without pictures or fans. I wanted to feel normal again.

"Excited baby?" Cameron asked.

I was lifted off my train of thought cause I heard Cameron say something.

"Hmm?" I asked.

"Are you excited?"

I thought about it. Not really. I'm more nervous.

"No just nervous. I hope Shawn does well."

He nodded and we went to gate A2 to find our seating. We finally found it. It was right next to the stage. I hear fans chanting after the starting performers went on. I saw fifth harmony and I saw this Camilla girl. Rumors went around that they were dating when I was with Shawn and nobody knew. I accused him of cheating. I mean he probably did. Look at her, she's so beautiful.

After Fifth Harmony Shawn came out. He looked at me smiling. I waved cheered him on.

"Cammm."

"What." He said with a little annoyance.

"Why you mad let's cheer for him, after this you won't see him for a while come on."

He sighed and cheered for Shawn while he was singing Ruin.

The concert ended and me and Cameron waited till we were the last ones to be in the stadium. Shawn let us onto the stage and we went backstage. The tension was rising at a fast pace.

Both boys were still very angry at each other. I didn't approve of both of their childishness.

"Stop being like children! You've been friends since forever are you going to let me a girl get between you're friendship?"

They looked at me with surprised eyes.

"You heard me pussies now make the fuck up or I will slap both of y'all back to the womb. It's all so stupid. Isn't it bro-code or some shit. Bros before hoes. I, not a hoe but you get what I'm saying."

"Shawn." Cameron said looking at him.

"Cam." Shawn said looking at him.

"I'm sorry bro." They both said in unison.

They hugged and I clapped. I was happy. I didn't want to hate Shawn I just want to be friends. I want him to be happy and he wants me to be happy, I assume he does. It's good Cam doesn't think of Shawn as the ex but as a friend. I no longer want to be awkward with Shawn. Our past is history, but the memories still play in both of our heads.

Shawn deserves to find happiness. I could never give that to him. I was in jolly old Canada in my tiny house, in my room while he was out touching lives and traveling.

He needs someone available. He needed someone who could be there. As much I tried he still wasn't happy with me. I hope Shawn finds someone. I've been oblivious while I was with him. I should have let him go before he went onto Magcon, so he could pursue his career.

It's too late for that now isn't it.

If I was a better girlfriend I wouldn't have broke up with him.

I just realized something.

I love Shawn.

I love him so much.

I need him.

-

;)