Jesse Eisenberg One Shots (Female Reader)

Columbus (1)

Movie: Zombieland

Although my real name was (Y/N), Tallahassee made me go by Maine because 'real names means we'll get too familiar with each other'.

Tallahassee and Columbus had picked me up on their way out east. I was in the middle of Texas, trying to find my way to a safe place when they found me, driving past me in their car and stopping abruptly.

Tallahassee did a quick check for bites, thankfully finding none, then reluctantly let me tag along. I sat in the backseat with Columbus in the passenger and Tallahassee driving.

Not long after they picked me up, we stopped at a grocery store. He boys and I had exhanged small bits of info on ourselves; about our families, life before zombies, and so on.

I quickly discovered that Columbus was really shy, jittery, and fucking adorable. Everyone one of his little stutters or attempts to be tough were so cute!

I also realized that, despite the rough exterior, Tallahassee was a softy inside. He was also a bit younger than he looked.

At the store, Tallahassee and Columbus each carried a gun, but there wasn't one for me. When I asked Tallahassee, he said a 'young lady' like myself shouldn't carry such a thing, and I nearly slapped him. Then I remembered he had a gun.

We walked inside, where Tallahassee began playing his banjo, guitar thing to attract zombies.

All of the zombies that came were rather...wide. They seemed to grow more out than they grew up.

The first one hurled right at me, rounding a corner and surprising me, immediately getting a grip on my arm. I screamed, yanking my arm away and running. I ran right into Cloumbus, who took his arm and put it around me, shooting the zombie.

I held onto Columbus as he and Tallahassee continued to shoot the zombies. I was already scared and that was the second zombie I'd ever seen. The first was only one we passed while in the car.

Once all zombies were dead, I still clung to Columbus, shaking. He looked down at me.

"You all right?" he asked me. I nodded slowly.

"Yeah, I just...I've never had one...run up to me like that...grab my arm...try to eat me..." He nodded.

"I guess it can be scary. I was startled, too, when it grabbed you, but you managed to get away quickly enough." I smiled, finally releasing myself from him.

"You two ready to keep going or what?" Tallahassee suddenly interrupted, scaring me.

I jumped away from Columbus, looking at my feet with a warm face. "Sorry, let's go," I said, still smiling from whatever happened between me and Columbus.

When I looked back at him, as Tallahassee was following the girl, he was a bit red. This made me smile wider as I walked after Tallahassee, Columbus trailing behind me.

---

Tricked out of a car and our weapons, Tallahassee, Columbus and I walked for a long time.

As we walked, Tallahasssee continuously ranted about Witchita and Little Rock, how he would exact his revenge and all.

I walked close to Columbus, occasionally looking over at him. Once in a while, we'd make eye contact, but he would turn away, red-faced. Finally, I stopped once I heard Tallahassee.

He began to yell about this car he'd found, in nearly perfect condition. H and Columbus checked the front while I looked in the back, beside Columbus. I was unzipping the large duffel bag I'd found when I heard Tallahassee again.

"Hey," he said, and he was looking at Columbus. He had the severed hand of a zombie or person and was holding the fingers to flip Columbus off.

"Real clever," he returned, but I giggled slightly at Tallahassee.

"Guys, check it out," I iterrupted, pulling a gun from the bag. It was a small pistol, but many bigger guns were still inside. I stepped aside, allowing Columbus to check it out.

"Thank God for rednecks!" Tallahassee yelled.

"Need a moment?" I asked, and he nodded. I went around the other side of the house, not hearing Clomubus behind me over Tallahassee's gun, which he was firing recklessly.

It startled me when I sat on a fallen tree and Columbus was right beside me. Like I said, I hadn't heard his footsteps.

Neither of us spoke, but I fiddled with the gun. Shakily, I raised it up, aiming for a target on a far-off tree. Not surprisingly, I missed by a long-shot.

"Never held a gun before?" Columbus asked. I shook my head.

"My dad had plenty, but I never touched them. They scared me when I was little." It got silent again, and I raise the pistol. I missed, even farther off this time

"Need help?" Columbus tried. I nodded.

"Some help sounds great," I returned, giving him a small smile.

Tallahassee's sudden "Yee-haw!" from the other side of the house startled both of us, but we laughed.

Gently, Columbus brought the both of us to stand. He moved behind me, then put his hands over mine.

"First, you aim," he said, bringing our hands up. I moved the gun until the little aim was on the center of the target.

"Now, take a deep breath, then let it out." I breathed in deep from my nose, then exhaled from my mouth.

"Fire." I released the trigger, smiling at the hit. It wasn't the center, but I still hit part of the target.

I dropped the gun, which thankfully didn't go off. Proud of myself, I wrapped my arms around Columbus' neck. He returned the hug not a moment later.

"Thank you," I said, pulling away from the hug only a little. I looked up at him, both of us smiling.

Those smiles faded the longer we looked at each other. Our eyes were locked, and neither of us spoke. I saw his own eyes glance downwards, towards my lips, but flick back up a moment later.

Finally, I leaned up, pushing my lips against his. The gunshots faded away as he pushed back, returning the kiss gladly.

I was absolutely sure I was his first kiss, but by the way he was kissing me, I would never have guessed it.

Sadly, we had to pull back to breathe. I was grinning, burying my face in his chest. I felt it move up and down with his labored breaths, and his hands grippes my sides.

Somehow, the zombie apocalypse didn't seem that bad anymore.