Through His Eyes/ In Her Eyes (KISSWARD)

This Is Not Me

Sorry guys! I've been busy doing gifts for the debut of my best friend. But here's an update!!! Keep the votes and comment coming! 😁💛

Edward's Pov

I was now sitting at the corner looking at the three girls building the tower we should have been building together.

Seeing the ladies, especially Kisses, looking sad and disappointed, I knew I regretted grabbing this while flag I'm holding.

Now I can't do something to help them. I'm feel like a bad friend. I chose myself rather than my friends who were beside me beyond everything that happened.

I sulked on the corner just looking at them, at her. "Come on girls, you can do it. I know you can." I cheered them how hoping that somehow I can ease the burden they have.

After not so long after, I can't hold it anymore. I regretted getting the flag and now I'm bearing it's consequences.

Yong, Christian and I decided to just hang inside the house and eat lunch first.

"I don't want to go to there for awhile. It just cracks my conscience even more." Yong started to talk.

I know Maymay keeps on singing songs that will haunt our conscience. She can be expressive if she wants. But the two girls, they are just silent.

And their silence is scarier than any angry voices that can stab your soul.

"Yong, if they are really friends, they can understand why we did this." Christian answered.

"But I know that they know what is the reason why we did this. And I'm pretty sure it also occurred in their minds, but the thing is, even though they know our dreams is at risk, they still chose the friendship they have above all. And now I think that's way better." I said explaining my thoughts.

Not so long, Kisses entered the Kitchen to eat her lunch. Since they decided to one by one eat lunch to save some time in building the tower.

"Let's eat Kisses." I said hoping she'll be that one of a hella energetic girl.

But she just replied with a small smile that I know didn't reach her eyes. "Sure. Thanks."

I regretted everything even more.

After I grab the white flag we faced the girls, and there, I saw their faces. Hurt and Sad. I looked at Kisses and when she stared back, it expresses the things I didn't want the important people in my life to feel. Disappointment, sadness, betrayal, and unimportance. From that moment I knew I've made the wrong decision in my life once again.

Kisses sat in front of me. She is across the table and just ate without a word. Her face is also gloomy and down.

What happened Edward? I thought you wanted her to smile? To make her feel important? To make all the people you love worthy of living? What happened? These are the thoughts eating me piece by piece every second that pass.

"How is it going Kisses? I mean the tower." I dare to spoke to her.

She spoke without looking up from her plate. "Uhmm, It's fine. I know we can do it."

We. A part where I, no longer belong. There's one thing to make everything right again. And I had made up my mind that I'll do it.

I just kept on glancing at her all the time. I can't even eat the food I have infront of me. When she stood up and she said she's going back to the task, I just stare at her.

When Kisses is nowhere in sight. "It's alright guys, they will understand." Christian speak up.

Well, understanding is different from accepting.

After she left I made my way to the Confession room.

"Edward." Big Brother greeted. "What brought you here?"

"Kuya." I started. "I wanna let go of my flag and help the girls again."

"Are you sure of this Edward?" Big Brother asked.

"Yes Kuya, I've made up my mind."

"If that's your decision then alright." Kuya answered. "But can I know what makes you give up the flag?"

"It's because I can't stand not helping them. That me who get that flag in the first place is not me. The real Edward won't do that. He won't choose his dreams over friendship. The real Edward won't let the ladies do the task on their own. That's not the way my folks raised me. They taught me to be a gentleman, to treat ladies with care and respect. I was not raised as a self centered person. And now, as I ponder to things, I know I had made the wrong decisions." I said honestly to Kuya.

"I salute you Edward. It's rare for people to think other people first than their own. You showed me how stronger you are. How your heart beats not only for yourself but also for those people around you."

"Thank you Kuya. I know I need to be with them through thick and thin."

An hour after I talked to Kuya, I'm back at the area where the are doing the task. I sat for a moment as I look at them working. I just smiled to myself because I know in myself this is right.

So I stood up and walked to the pole where we got the flags. As I put it back in place I saw the girls gaping at my way seeming so curious.

I walked to them and smiled again.

"What did you do?" Vivoree asked.

"I surrendered it." I said with a smile.

"Oh-My." Maymay said. "You don't need to do that."

"I know, but the Edward who chose the flag..it's not me."
"Awww. Thank you Edward." Maymay said with a cheery smile.

"I'm sorry guys." I said to them as I looked at Kisses.

"You're not the one to blame." Kisses replied. "All of us wanted that spot, but now you're here. And thank you." She added with a gentle and proud smile on her face.

"I'm sorry again." I repeated thinking countless sorry isn't enough to make it up to them.

"It's alright Ed. Now you are here and that's what is important. You didn't left us hanging at all."

"Thanks." I said at Kisses with her smile that's making my day.

There, I went to hug her first. I snuggled in her as the other girls joined in the group hug.

"You know what makes everything worse? The cold treatment you gave us." I joked at them.

"Ohh. Sorry Ed. We didn't mean to." Vivoree said.

"I'm sorry to you guys, we've just been hurt." Kisses added.

"I know. I love you guys." I said with full of sincerity as I gaze at Kisses once more.