We can hurt together

~ Darren ~

DARREN

*8 years earlier*
September 11th

I've been sitting in the sidewalk since school was over. I was really tired, but my brother was taking me to the skate park as an early birthday present. So, I couldn't argue. But where could my brother be?

After a while, I see my dad's car. I guess, my brother was stuck in traffic. I got up and walked to the passenger door of my dad's car. Before I could step in, my dad demands me to go sit in the back. I was confused to why, but I did as I was told.

I could feel the tension in the car. I guess, he was having a bad day. Since some of his employees give him hard times. At least that's what I thought.

Arriving home, I hopped out of the car, heading towards the front door. Opening it, I could feel that something bad happened. Something that could change us.

"Mom," I called out, but there was no response. That is until I heard someone crying. It came from the living room. I started walking towards the crying and I see my mother crying silently.

"Mom," I paused, sitting next to her. "Mom, what's wrong?" I asked softly, in a comforting way. She didn't respond. Instead, she stood up and sat in the love chair. I frowned, but quickly changed my expression. What did I do?

I decided to head up to my room, until I felt someone pulling me from the collar of my shirt. I fell back landing on my ass. What the heck?

"It's your fault!" My dad screamed at me, grabbing me by the collar of my shirt, again, and pulled me up against the wall. I whimpered in pain. I was terrified. What is wrong with him? I haven't done anything wrong.

"Dad!" I tried to lose his grip from my shirt. "Please stop! You're scaring me." I pleaded but it was no use. He was too emotional. I saw the rage, the disappointment and the grief. I even saw tears streaming down his checks. It was like seeing a broken wolf when his love one passed away.

"You killed him!!" Dad yelled, again, at my face. "You hypocrite!" He spat. I began to tremble out of fear. I've never seen my father act this way.

"You..." He paused, looking down, trying to find his voice. "... killed my son. You just had to ask him to pick you up, didn't you?" With that said, I froze. I couldn't believe it, my best friend, my rock, my brother.

I've never felt this way before. Never in my life I would feel this way. So, empty. So, alone. I've never known what it feels like to lose someone so close to you, someone who knows you completely, someone who knows when to cheer you up, or even help you in your homework.

It feels as if someone were to stab you repeatedly. With no regrets, with no mercy. There were no words to describe this indescribable feeling inside me. It was this massive pain like no other I've ever felt. I couldn't even compare it to the pain my father was causing me.

I feel even worse for my little sister. She will never have the chance to have that bond I had with my brother. To feel like she's not alone, like she's not dumb, to feel loved. She's only 2 years old. She's so innocent. So, young. She doesn't deserve this. No one should.

My thoughts were interrupted, when my father slapped me in the face. The impact was so hard that I think it would be purple by morning. He lets go of the grip he had on my collar, making me land on the floor. I was immediately kicked in my stomach, twice. Doesn't he know I'm hurt too? Then he began to punch me several times in the face along with the kicking in my stomach. By now I could barely breath. I was bleeding from my nose and mouth. Throughout the hole punching and kicking, all I could think about is the fact that my mother didn't do anything to stop my father. Not even scream at him to stop. I felt betrayed, I thought she would help me. I thought she was my light. The light that would shine the dark, but I was wrong. I was truly, but truly wrong. I couldn't stop the tears roaming down my checks. I was hurt. No, I was more than hurt. I was crushed.

"Darren, just go to your room." She finally speaks. "And take Hannah with you." I almost forgot that Hannah was in the room.

Placed my hand on my stomach, standing up I grabbed Hannah from her crib and carried her to my room upstairs. I knew from now on nothing will be the same for us. Nor for Hannah, nor for me. I still couldn't stop crying. I don't know who my parents are anymore.

I placed little Hannah in my bed with her favorite blanket. "Dada!" little Hannah exclaimed. It was so adorable. Just by seeing her made me forget about what just happened. It made me feel less crushed.

"No, Hannah, I'm big brother. Not dada." I grabbed her little hands in mine, making her giggle. I laughed along with her. What a beautiful smile.

"Dada!" she exclaimed again. I simple nodded, kissing her check.

"Yes bugger, dada." She is going to be the most beautiful woman in my life. "Don't worry, Hannah, I'll make your dreams come true. Even if it costs me. Our brother would be proud." I placed her closer to me so that we could sleep.