The Book of Us

Screams and blank faces

I hear a scream, I shoot up from my position, lying down. It's my scream I hear. I'm breathing deeply. Hudson puts his arms around me.
"What happened?" He whispers in my ear.

"I don't know, I just woke up screaming".

I know what happened. I always do. It's the same every time. I'm sitting on a park bench and I'm watching a girl getting beaten up by two boys. Boys from my class. I walk over and look at the girl. She's faceless. Until I remember the time I was in this exact position. Then my face shows on her blank one. My breathing becomes heavy. I reach out to pull the boys off myself and my hands go right through them. The first one  takes a Swiss Army knife out of his pocket. He attempts to stab me. I'm fighting my restraints and he misses my chest. He gets my left arm. Once. Twice. The second time is severe my blood pools on the uneven bricks. I scream and wake up. This is normal. It happens one to two times a night. And Hudson's always there to comfort me. He's been with me each night since he found out about the nightmares. I don't tell him the truth. I tell him I don't remember. He knows I remember though. I can just tell he does. But he doesn't question it. Maybe he got mad that night. Maybe he got tired. Maybe he'd just had enough. And maybe that's why why he broke up with me that morning. I didn't really feel it when he first said it I just kinda nodded and walked off. I was too mentally numbed to think. When the anaesthetic-like-trance wore off it only hurt a little. Like that feeling you get in your jaw from not talking for a long time. But it hurt more than if it would have if it hurt me like it hurt girls in sappy movies. It hurt so much more than that, I lost someone I loved, not someone I thought I loved.