✉ The Chat Room ✉ *ON HOLD*

✉ The Chat Room ✉ ⇨ Chapter 4

Picture of Mr. Henderson

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Chapter Four

"Are you gonna finish that?" Lurlene asked me, which just made me snap out of my daze.

"Nope." I told her and gave her the other half of my sandwich.

I looked out at the soccer field, where I knew Jason was right now. Probably with Tiffany sitting on the bleachers with her friends, all drooling over her boyfriend and telling her how adorable and perfect she and Jason look together.

Gawd I hate her so much.

It's kind of hard to believe that she and I used to be friends.

No, it's true.

Although that was after she had flushed my teddy bear down the toilet. Poor teddy...


There was a time back before Tiffany became this evil that terrorized the school, when she and I were best friends.

We would have a sleepover almost every chance we got. We would have dance parties, watch movies, make prank calls, bake brownies, play video games, play basketball in my backyard, talk about how weird boys were and talk about the future.

She told me her mom wanted her to become a model, just as she had been when she was younger but that she actually wanted to learn to play the violin, one day move to new york and go to Julliard to study music.
I told her I wanted to be a vet, because I loved animals and maybe even work in a zoo once I started high school.

But then we both changed.

I realized I loved drawing and writing more than I loved animals, and gave up my dreams of ever working in a zoo, and she realized that since she inherited her mom's traffic stopping
good looks that she could just become a cheerleader and get new, better friends,
and unlike me, be invited to all the parties, and have guys compliment her whenever she wanted.

So she left me in the dust. I don't even know if she ever learned to play the violin.

But then I met Lurlene, and although she hated sleepovers and playing basketball, I was still lucky to have such an amazing best friend that was always there for me, and who even listened to me talking endlessly about my crush on the Jason Haart. For years.

I looked over at her and saw her happily eating the sandwich, and write something down in her journal. She never let anyone read it. She rarely let me read it. Not that I wanted to.
I know she would never really write anything mean or hurtful. She just writes because it helps her organize her thoughts. Almost like she's making a list of everything she's thinking of.

And although she writes, she doesn't want to become a writer. I don't think I want to become on either.

I have always admired how Lurlene sees the future. As not something to be too afraid of.

While most people cling to the past and everything that's familiar to them, Lurlene has always understood that nothing can really last forever, and she just enjoys things knowing that she will have to eventually say goodbye and let go.

I wish I could be more like that. Then I'd probably let go of my fear of being rejected by Jason, and I'd finally tell him how I feel.

I was close once.
There was a lame Halloween party at school, a few years back, and I was in one of the classrooms. Lurlene and I were talking, I was drinking punch.

In walked Jason and a few other people. Pretty soon someone yelled out "Let's play spin the bottle!", which just made me roll my eyes.

Lurlene and I were barely paying attention to the game, but the bottle pointed at me. I rolled my eyes, and was going to say that I wasn't even playing, when some girl that I can't even remember the name of, asked "do you have a crush on someone?".

Again I rolled my eyes, and was going to say "No." But then I glanced at Jason for a sec before looking away. And Lurlene nudged me, as if to say "it's now or never".

So I took a breath, but right before I got the chance to say the name of my crush, the door opened and I saw Tiffany walk in, smiling her sweet smile, and I heard her sigh the name I had mentally prepared myself to say just a moment ago: "Jason".

It of course followed by her walking over and hugging him.

Something I would never be brave enough to do.

And that was it. That was the last time I even tried to say that I had a crush.

Looking back, I know that having said that I had a crush on Jason would of probably not done anything. It would just lead to a bunch of kids teasing me, followed by Tiffany being her usual cruel self, and of course I'd blush like an idiot and not know what to say.

Maybe Jason would feel uncomfortable too.

It's not like he could of said that he had a crush on me too, he had a girlfriend. A very popular and gorgeous girlfriend that he was happy with.

At least he looks like he's happy with her...

"Hey!" Lurlene called out.

"Huh?" I reply dazed.

I have to stop getting so carried away with my thoughts...

"We have to go now, or we'll be late." She said, and stood up, brushing the crumbs off her jeans and reaching her hand out to me.

"Alright." I told her and took the hand she offered, letting her pull me up.

Here we go again...