One Life. Don't Waste It.

No one wants to grow up and face the real world but no one wants to stay young, hindered by adults always telling them what to do.

I feel trapped; trapped inside my body, trapped by my age, trapped by the future that awaits me. The uncertainty holds onto me like a plague. The fear eating me from the inside out.

Time.

Always ticking by. People say you should be weary of life in the fast lane, that before you know it you're in a nursing home.

But what lane? What path do I take that leads me to the lane? How long will I have to wait before I can be free? Free from stress and worry.

But for how long? How do I make the most of what I've got before it's gone? How do I not fear the inevitable? What about the plans I have to make in order to move towards the lane I need to get on? What if I choose wrong? What then?

Life is often compared to a rollercoaster, twisting and turning, winding down a track ahead of you.

The choices I make now affect what I'll do in the future. I'm making a shot in the dark, hoping that whatever happens is good.

But what if I miss?

What if?

I'm tired of regretting the things I can't change; fearing the choices I make. I'm suffocating. I've been given one life and this is not how I want to live it.

I want to be remembered. I want to be loved by those I care about. I want to do the things I love and live in the moment. Keep my eyes on the path I'm on right now, not wasting time looking back or looking too far forward.

The lane I'm in is all I want to focus on.

The breath I breathe everyday is what I want to focus on.

The heart beating in my chest, the blood surging through my veins, the gravity holding me down on this planet is what I want to focus on.

The faith I have in God is what I want to focus on.

I have one life.

I need to let myself live it.