Sometimes I'm so happy that I could laugh at stupid jokes , sometimes I'm sad that I want to be alone and wear this earphone blasting the music , Sometimes I'm sad that I want someone to talk , sometimes I roast my friends not knowing that they were hurt. I'm really sorry for that I felt guilt when I'm alone in my house , strumming this guitar like my emotion like I'm angry to myself . Conscience always appear at the end screaming that will drive me crazy , maybe this problem I had just made me a new me.
I know I roast all of you but I just want you to know... Fight me back and I'll never have my revenge , Just please don't stab me at my back . I can handle the pain just hit me at my face . Tell me if I'm wrong , rebuke me if I'm bad , Just tell it directly to me . I was suffered to bullying before changing my humanity into a fiend . I was a man living with my past , regrets , pain , darkness .
=*OHHH... and I was not hurt for what you wrote . I was hurt for some is not hurting me back, when I hurt them . Because my conscience is the one who haunting me if my mistake I can't do right. It's like my heart is rupturing me that I'm choked by my words , I can't tell "Sorry". Easy to write but hard to say, I may say sorry but look at my eyes if I'm sincere for I am the deceiver that always victimize my peers and myself . I know that you know me well but you don't know how many mask I wore and the masks that I'll made for the next journey.*=
This is the really me , Wearing a mask to escape the tragedy . I am so hypocrite for telling you that you have a big ego(pride) forget about it be yourself I'm only a cancer , for telling you to be stay strong for everybody may roast or bully you , (smirk) Look at me now ... yes I'm strong but i was changed my problems that I've received, I feel that I'm not the same anymore for what I am yesterday .
I'm just acting that I'm not okay but deep inside I'm alright , sometimes I act okay but deep inside I'm not. It's hard to understand right? .
All my Oeuvre is for all the person I want to understand me , love is the thing that I haven't that's why I'm so curious about it. Because I felt that I was unloved by my family and my friends, I was hurt for some of my friends don't want to try to understand , I was wanted them to understand me but I knew they will call me a psycho that I'm crazy that I'm a freak . I used to be quite to tape my mouth to stop roasting . I used to laugh loudly to cover my pain . I used to me live like this to repent my sins . I knew God may forgive me for what I did but my mind is crippling my mind to be depressed to punish myself .
Maybe I'm so dramatic on this but it really mean much to me , Hope many of you can understand this .
To: especially to you and All I'd roast
