Eventually I had woken up in my bed. I figured I fell asleep from being deep thought. I guess no one came home either because if someone had it would be noisy from the kitchen. I slowly stood up trying to catch my balance. Walking out of my room I grabbed my jacket, slipped it on, then left.
"THIS is IT correct? YOU are giving UP. Coward." he screamed. "YOU'RE A DAMN COWARD." he laughed.
I will pay a cowards debt. I've given up. Death wins because I can't withstand this any longer. I'm a horrible person and I just want it to end so badly. I don't have much to live for. Family? My family's grown tired of my instability. Friends? They all give up on me eventually because it's happened time after time and I don't blame them for it at all. I would've given up on me too if I were them. Self control? I have none. I just want to end my suffering and fade away in order to become nothing. I continued walking to the nearest bridge that stands above a river stream in our town.
It's a place I've gone to before when there's a lot on my mind. I remember when I used to get hit and kicked upon by two people I used to know. I took it on like a soldier on the outside. I let them beat me up if it made them feel better. I realize now I don't hate them at all and that I'd do it again in a heart beat. All the times I was bullied but spread a smile on my face then cried in myself to sleep were nothing compared to how I feel right now. All the times I've wanted to break my mirrors make me want to wish mirrors never existed because I hate what I see. The police are tired of me too. I doubt anyone could save me from myself right now. I don't want to leave anything behind.
"Its clear to me that you've fallen deep this time Miles." he whispered softly.
I've imagined my death so many times. I'm tired of having nightmares of suicide or murder every night. I'm sick of waking up wanting to cry. I'm sick of crying in the shower. There once was a time where I was happy and everything was amazing. The world was much brighter then but now I don't have a world at all. I stood upon the edge while looking down at the pointy rocks in the stream below. I don't care if it hurts. Please...please make me go away? That's all I want is to go away. I leaned over completely shifting my weight as my one foot went in the air. I fell and for once I was smiling. Tears of joy slid down both my cheeks and then I hit the rocks and water below.
YOU ARE READING
BURNT OUT
Short StoryDive deep into the mind of eighteen year old Miles Peter a man whose insanity leads him to death. His corruption burns through his veins and once you see things the way he does it'll feel like pure pain. See how he feels leading to his last moment...
