Di•vorce

Di-vorce {II}

II

Her things were packed and stuffed into two suitcases, standing beside the door frame. She could leave right now. She probably even should leave right now and never look back. What was even the point in staying here any longer? He probably wouldn’t even notice that she was gone.

Sheila slumped onto the edge of the bed, slowly sinking into the soft mattress.

She couldn’t.

She just couldn’t leave. She wanted to spend as much time as she could. Even if it was only hours. She knew she shouldn’t but she wanted to. She felt a tug at her heart just by thinking about leaving. It was as if a magical force was holding her back, telling her not to leave, although her mind protested, telling her it was pathetic.

And she knew what was holding her back.

She did. He didn’t.

“I’m sorry.” The tears stung in her eyes and she gently placed her hand on her stomach. “I’m so sorry.” Her voice was barely a whisper. 

“Believe me, I don’t want to leave but your Dad wants me to leave.” She tightly closed her eyes, but immediately opened them as the image of the divorce papers had flashed in front of her eyes.

”I think he doesn’t love me, anymore. But you know… maybe he’s right. It isn’t working anymore and maybe this is the best for the two of us. And for you,” she continued talking, her voice breaking at some points. Tears were rolling down her cheeks and seconds later they dropped onto her hand, which was still resting on her stomach.

“I talked to my friend Alyson. She told me, we could move in with her. There’s enough space for the three of us,” she paused, lost in her thoughts for a moment then shook her head vehemently. “No, you know, I still can’t believe it. I can’t believe that he wants a divorce. I can’t believe that he doesn’t care anymore. And I can’t believe that I’m sitting in this stupid guest room, while he’s probably having some nice dinner with his contract partners.”

She closed her eyes as small tears of sheer frustration escaped her eyes. She quickly wiped them away and sniffed.

“We’ve never slept in different rooms. Even though he was barely at home, our bedroom smelled of him. I felt safe in it, even if he wasn’t next to me. You know, sometimes I even felt him slip next to me into bed, even if it was only for a few hours.” She sighed.

Suddenly she felt tired. Her mind was clouded, whirling but no specific thoughts were forming and no more words were spoken. A strange numbness took over her mind and body; her whole body just felt cold and frozen, like she was slipping into shock.

All of a sudden the door opened with a loud bang, jolting her body out of its state of numbness. Her eyes snapped open and focused on the black shadow, which was standing in the doorway. It was only then that she realized she had been sitting in complete darkness. The dim light from the hallway barely reached into the room and she still couldn’t make out any features of the person in front of her except for the outline of the body.

The shadow moved slightly and after a small click, the whole room was flooded with bright light. Although her eyes protested as they adjusted to the sudden brightness of the light, she kept them firmly set on the person in front of her, not even blinking once.

As surprised as she was by Aiden’s sudden presence, she was perplexed to see his exterior appearance. He was wearing grey jogging bottoms and a deep blue wife beater hung loosely over his upper body. His normally perfectly combed hair was disheveled and pointing into different direction while his eyes were wide and showed distress.