The voices in my head are telling me "PANIC! Panic like you've never panicked before, so that's what I'm doing. Why you ask, well let's just say that my brother Alek Stern told me that he had a surprise for me before sending me off to school that morning, where I would get beaten, battened, and bruised, because of my two medical conditions Cerebral Palsy and Insanity, so I typically call that place my personal hell. Did I mention I hate surprises? No, well I do.
The jingle jangle of keys sounding like Jingle Bells reminds me that he's home from work as I get into my position to tackle him even before he would open the door. "Aby, I'm home," he says entering the room as I scream "BUBBA!!!," yes that is a nickname for him I don't like to call him by his name unless I'm mad at him which never happens, or I'm under a trance of my own demons, and yes that's a nickname for my insanity. Not looking where I'm going I trip on the rug that separates the living room and the dining room sending me right into his arms.. You could say that was planned, but anyways.
"Careful Princess," he says carrying me into the kitchen and setting me down on the kitchen counter as he grabs the groceries that had fallen out of his hand when he went to go and catch me.
"How was your day," I ask while swinging my legs back and forth.
"It was good, better now that I'm home," he says giving me a kiss on the top of my head. There he goes making me blush leaving me only 3 consecutive seconds of happiness before I hear my demons say "Stop being so lovey-dovey with him, he's only being nice to you, so that way he can do "the nasty" with you later on." I didn't know what they meant by "the nasty," however kids in my school use it when I walk down the halls and they would also point at me it's not a pretty sight to see.
"No, you're wrong," I mumble under my breath not so successfully though as Bubba looks up to me and asks with an eyebrow raised "I'm wrong about what baby girl, that I want to barbecue tonight, would you prefer takeout?"
I can feel myself getting infuriated, my inner demons not letting me fight them back. It was like my body was as still as ice glistening in the sunlight before it melts into a puddle of my madness. I then realize I am crying when I touch my face as Bubba runs to me and just holds me cradling me like how a mother would to their child. I snap out of it when I hear him humming something like a lullaby and ask.. "How long was I out?"
"Just a few seconds," he says while holding me tightly. I then release from his tight grip as I sigh and say "Yeah, but it's only going to get worse." He just looks at me with sadness in his eyes and then clears his throat "So, barbecue or takeout," he asks me changing the subject.
"Whichever is fine," I say as I try to shake off the bad headache I have from my experience just now.
"Okay, well do you have homework?"
I look at him with a strange look on my face and just shrug "Yeah a little," lying to him of course, because the truth is for the last 7 years I haven't even been in my classes to even know, because I'm shoved in a locker or in another part of school. So, how do I find out? By having a girl who's actually nice to me take a picture of it and then she sends it to my iPod. That's how. She also takes videos of the lessons secretly so that way I can learn the material. It's not ideal, but the system works.
To be honest though, it wasn't usually like this it started right before I started kindergarten, which was exactly 7 years ago at the age of 5, however the relationship Bubba and I possess has been since I was born if you stick around I could probably tell you the story, but you have to promise you won't judge my brother so quickly the things you are about to witness some of them aren't pretty, so please keep an open mind.
I can hear my Momma's screams and cries as she's in agony with pain mostly from being pregnant with me. My dad Jasper was getting her bag ready, because ready or not I was coming, or at least that's what Bubba told me.
