The bright sun shines through the window, on to my sheets that used to be white but or now covered in dirt and stains.
My head is throbbing, why do I do this to myself?
I turn my head away from the sun and let out a small yelp, absolutely freaked out.
There laying completely naked in all his glory is a guy in a deep sleep.
I can hardly even remember taking him home with me, fuck I'm not even sure who that is.
Slowly and carefully I untangle my, also very naked body from the sheets and tiptoe to the closet, only grabbing underwear and a large T-shirt.
This is so stupid of me every single weekend this happens and every single morning after I curse myself for doing this, not the drinking, that I would never give up, but bringing a new guy home every weekend.
My life has been a roller coaster since Jonas and I broke up, no matter what I try I just can't seem to get my feet on the ground again.
I write a small note for the mysterious guy that is still sleeping in my bed, saying that I had fun last night but unfortunately I have somewhere to be. That is a lie, absolutely.
In fact I have no place to go, Noora hooked up with some guy from Oslo and I'm not that close with the other girls yet.
I don't know it just feels uncomfortable to show up at their house on a Saturday morning out of nowhere.
I finally decide to just go have breakfast alone and then maybe hit the gym. I make sure that my roommate Thomas knows of the mysterious dude.
He better not steal any of my shit. I used to dance so I'm still pretty strong, could totally beat him up.
I wouldnt really say that I'm skinny, fit or anything like that but I try to go to the gym a couple of times a week.
I don't necessarily do it to make my body look ,,hot" or that shit that guys are after.
More because of the rush, to release the pressure that always seems to be pressing against my body, against my skin, almost like there is something inside me begging to get out.
I know it sounds crazy, maybe I am a little crazy, I don't even know myself anymore.
The girl that I used to be, the girl who wanted to spare her first kiss, her first taste of alcohol, her first time having sex, she is gone, long gone.
I was so busy trying to be someone I'm not that I didn't even realized what i was doing to myself, but now, well I guess there is no going back.
Go hard or go home right?
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So I know the first chapter is a little off but I promise it will get better ;)
Feel very free to tell me what you guys think and if you have any comments good or bad bring em (without being mean you guys) :)
YOU ARE READING
Lonely for You only || Eva Mohn
Fanfiction"Do i wanna know? If This feeling flows both ways Sad to see you go Was sort of hoping that you'd stay Baby, we both know That the nights were mainly made for saying things that you can't say tomorrow day"
