"I'm going to- I'll be right back," I whispered to Ian. I'm pretty sure he can't hear me because he's sleeping. I tried to not make a lot of noise as I got up and grabbed my phone off the nightstand.
I walked down stairs and gladly no one is fucking home for once. I dialed Mandy's number, not knowing who else to call.
"Mickey?"
"Uh- yeah. Hey." I said.
she stayed silent for a few seconds, "is everything okay?"
"Not really."
"Is Ian okay?"
"No." I admitted.
I herd a lot of noises on her end of the phone. "What's going on?" She asked.
"He's not taking his medication."
"Why?"
I sat down, trying to keep my voice down. "He doesn't like them. I'm the only one that knows that he's not taking them. It's really getting to me, I feel like I'm hurting him. I feel shitty."
"You should feel shitty Mick. He could- hurt himself. Have you thought about that?"
I slammed my hand on the table. "Fuck, of course I have thought about it. That's why I'm calling you. I- had a dream about him, ya know, doing that."
"He needs his medication."
"I don't want him leaving me. I don't want him to go in a psych ward. I want him to be here with me Mandy. I want him to be sleeping right next to me," I chocked on my words.
"I know. but please. I know you care about him and so do I, he will come around. He won't leave you"
"You don't know that."
I herd movement upstairs, "I need to go."
"Mickey..." she said.
"Yes, I'll make him take them." I said softly as I hung up and went upstairs.
I can't see his face because he's wrapped in his blanket. "Ian" I said as I walked over to he bed. I moved my hand and tried rolling him over. He stayed silent. Jesus fuck. Great. He's depressed. I fucked up. This is all my fucking fault. "Ian, please.."
"Leave."
"Ian please, I'm here. Don't do this-"
"Leave me alone Mickey." He screamed.
I got up and scanned the room to see if there was anything he could hurt himself with. I then shut the door and left the room. I wiped away my remaining tears and went downstairs.
I herd the door open and saw Carl walk in. "Keep checking on Ian, I gotta go."
"Check on him? Why?"
"Just fucking do it." I mumbled as I walked past him and went outside.
I walked down the street, looking like a little bitch. Tears won't stop coming out of my eyes. I fucked up and I need to get away.
I reached the alibi room and went instead to ordered some beer. I need to forget about Ian for just a fucking second. He's always in my mind, his fucking red hair and his fucking alien looking ass.
"What's up with you?" Kev said, making me want to punch him in the fucking face.
"Nothing."
I herd my phone ring but didn't bother to pick it up. I bet it's Mandy, or Fiona. I don't wanna hear about Ian right now.
"You gonna answer that?"
"Fuck," I mumbled as I grabbed it out of my pocket and saw it was a random ass number.
"Who the fuck is this?" I answered.
"Carl. Ian, he uh-"
"He what, spit it out."
"He's not moving, or like anything."
"What the fuck do you mean he's not moving?" I raised my voice and I'm pretty sure everyone is staring at me, fuck they looking at?
"He's alive. But like, he's telling me to leave."
"Then fucking leave him alone. Just keep checking on him," I said as I hung up the phone.
Jesus fucking Christ.
