My Psychotic Husband. (A Michael Jackson story.)

Chapter 15

Lauren's POV

All of  a sudden i'm rushed into an ambulance seeing  Michael's  violent shaking body. I don't know what to do. Scream, cry, yell. I feel numb. My body and brain can't function yet, I can't take my eyes off of him.  My mind is telling me to rush to him, but my feet remain still as a mouse. All of a a sudden a force hits me. I run in the ambulance as fast I can. 

When my eyes land on Michael, it takes a minute for me to take a good look and him. He looks terrible. Lifeless almost. His brown eyes were rolled to the back of his head while a paramedic was trying to adjust an oxygen mask on his face. His beautiful skin tone was a bit pale. I guess it has been a while since I've seen him because his vitiligo had spread. He's lost a lot of pigmentation since the last time I saw him. Also because of his Lupus, his skin is a bit red. 

Never mind all of that I take hold of his hand while we head down to the hospital.  Once we arrived at the hospital his breathing was stabilized again. He's unconscious right now, and I'm waiting on a doctor. 

I'm about to head out into the hallway to call my doctor's office to cancel the four month checkup until I hear a weak voice pull me back 

"Lauren"? 

I turn around with tears already forming in my eyes from missing him so much. I begin to walk towards him and I kiss him with everything I have. When we pull away he starts talking again. 

"Angel I am so so so sorry." "I ruined this whole day, this was supposed to be our day to find out what we're having and I totally screwed up this whole thing." 

"Michael how many times do I have to tell you that NOTHING is your fault." I don't know how much times I have to tell to tell you that. It's not your fault. I'm just glad that you are okay. You have no idea how worried I was when I saw how lifeless you were looking. I almost got this gut wrenching feeling that our child would have to go on without a father."

Michael eyes grew wide when he heard me voice my thoughts. He stared at me for what felt like an eternity. I didn't pressure him into saying anything because I didn't want to trigger something in him but he never said a word. All he did was turn around in the hospital bed and put his head down. I could see his body physically shaking which means he was sobbing. I simply got behind him and wrapped my arms around him. 

I should have never said that to him. This is all my fault. 

* A few hours later*

Currently Michael and I are on the way home. The doctors said that it was fine for him to leave. He's actually only coming home for the weekend. He has to go back to rehab on Monday to work on completing his treatment. His real release date is on his birthday which is really celebratory. I have to plan something special for him. 

He hasn't said a word to me on the ride home but, he's been holding my hand very tightly which is actually a relief to me. It gives me validation that he's not mad at me. It just frightens me how silence he is. I know not to ask him what he's feeling... trust me I've learned the hard way.  I have the remainders of bruises to show that. 

We just walked inside of the house when Michael has now let go of his grip that he had on my hand. I still haven't made eye contact with him. All of a sudden I feel his hand lift my chin. "I'm going upstairs for a while." he said softly. I just nodded, he kissed me and slowly walked up. 

I go outside in our backyard and walk to the chairs we have out there and I begin sobbing because I feel hopeless for some reason.

Michael's POV

I walk into Lauren and I's bedroom and take a look around. Nothing has changed at all except for some picture frames which from my guess is a replacement. She must have broken the original ones from a mix or rage and anger. I can't blame her though. She must hate me even though her words say otherwise. I feel so guilty for all of this happening. This feels like all my fault. Today was supposed to be one of the best day of our lives not another bad one. This weekend we were supposed to be making love not avoiding each other. 

I hate how this weekend has turned out and it's all because of me. Sometimes I feel like nothing is ever going to get better. I feel like I will always be the same. Lauren will take our child and leave me or she will put me in an insane asylum. Sometimes I feel like that's where I belong. I put my head between my hands and whisper to myself "Why am I still alive?"

To be continued...

Hi! I can't believe I'm updating this story after a whole year. I wouldn't be surprised if there were no comments or votes. First off I just want to say how sorry I am for not updating. Every time I wrote this chapter I hated the way it looked and on top of that I got busy with school and work. I'm hoping to start updating regularly again! I hope you all enjoyed this part. Let me know what you think! 

~ Ariana