a Piece of Art

12.0 T H E B R E A K

   The next couple of days could only be described as depressing. An air of sadness covered us all and every time we gathered all together, it was clear that someone was missing.

   I feared we wouldn't be able to survive the loss of one of our members. That's how deep the hole between us was getting.

   Somehow Steph had ended up glued to Leah, and I had to Blake. We continued with our Friday movie nights, as painful as it was and that somehow brought us to talk more about Jackson. Naomi still stick with me, but also focused more in Leah and Steph. Leah and I still worked together, and she vented a lot to me. Though conversations had gotten a bit more stiff when she told me about his last words and when she figured I must have seen them that evening at the coffee shop.

   Steph and Leah ended up going to Naomi's house for the holidays. Leah didn't want to have to explain herself in front of her parents. Steph just wanted to be there. They would figure out later if they wanted to go somewhere else after Christmas.

   They actually invited me to join, and I seriously considered it, seeing that Blake had already left to his parents house. No one really caring about the last few days of classes. I declined though, because I didn't think I could do it. As sad as it sounded, it sounded safer to stay at home.

   I didn't tell them either but Naomi's house was too close from my parent's for my liking. So I was alone for the whole break and I actually just wanted to forget everything that had happened, the stress because of school, because of our friend's death.

   I wanted to spend it moping around, reading, crying, being warm drinking hot chocolate inside of my small apartment. I didn't care it didn't sound as a good healthy closure treatment. But it was just the relaxing time I needed. Even since I had left my family house, I hadn't let myself just stop and realize what I had done. I haven't had the time to take care of my wounds and plan what the hell I would be doing with my life.

   Somewhere in that train of thought, Parker Wells made an appearance. We'd been talking. I'd been talking to Pam and we had just closed a deal to have one of my New York photos be featured in the gallery.

   We hadn't been talking about the gallery though. He seemed actually interested in getting to know me. I just couldn't have thought of a less appropriate time to be getting on with him. With all the sadness around me, I couldn't bear be feeling happy for some guy. Or man should I say. Our age gap being something noticeable. I doubted he wanted something with me, anyway, considering that. I was probably a kid in his eyes.

   That time right after Jackson's dead, when he came to my house, it just felt intimate, comfortable. He managed to make me feel better, cooked for me and kept me company like he said he would. It almost made me think my dreams could have been true, and he would be a Prince Charming.

   It was the night before Christmas and I felt a little lonely. Maybe I would regret it, but I decided to text him.

   "Hey you, happy almost Christmas! Any exciting plans?"

   I felt lame sending him a message like that, but the first thing I learned from the actual Parker Wells was that he didn't judge me. I could tell him the silliest of things and he would just laugh along with me and tell me something even worse he had done.

   His response came quickly, it seemed like he always had his phone at hand and responded right away. "Hey stranger. I'm glad you are out of your cave. I'm not really a fan of these holidays, spending the night in. You?"

   I honestly didn't imagine him as someone who would get excited because of Christmas, it didn't sound like him, so his response didn't surprise me. I also imagined he wouldn't either be coming to his parents house.

   I typed, "I'm not usually a fan either. I was feeling lonely." I deleted it. Too needy.

   Instead I answered, "yeah, I'm not a fan either. Too much happiness."

   "Are you spending it alone?" His reply came fast, again.

   "Yep", the exchange of messages was what I was looking for, his company through the phone already made me feel better.

   "Would you like to hang out?"

   His words, through the text resounded in my mind for a few minutes. Was he serious? Did he really want to spent his Christmas with me?

   "Are you serious?" I asked, anxiously typing.

   "Why not? We can go to a bar and at midnight wish each other a happy Christmas. At least you won't be alone."

   Clearly my problem wasn't spending it alone or not. He seemed to forget the fact that I couldn't legally get into a bar and that we were practically strangers. Specially I was to him, he didn't know we'd been childhood neighbors.

   Forgetting all of those though, I decided to be impulsive again. It hadn't ended so bad last time, after all, right?