Hold me, Angel. (destiel)

Chapter 17

*Dean*

It was early July and Dean and Cas were farther apart then ever. Cas was never home and when he was all they did was argue. 

"I'm done right now Dean! I'll be back tonight I'm going to work. " Cas yelled.

"Do you even love me, Cas!? You're never here! I just want you to love me!!" Dean screamed.

"Of course, I love you. I love you so much. Don't ever question my love, Dean! I have school and work it's not my fault."

"I miss you, Cas." Dean whispered.

"I know." Cas responded.

"That's part of the problem. You know, but do you care? You told me I was always the most important but am I even important now? You are my everything, Cas!" Dean raising his voice.

"Dean, when I get back we can talk and---"

"Save it." Dean said as he grabbed his keys and stormed out.

He ran down the stairs and jumped in the Impala. He drove to the nearest bar and ordered a beer.

"Tough night?" The bartender asked.

"Yea." Dean responded grabbing the beer from her.

"Might be looking up, you got an admirer." She said, pointing behind him.

He turned around and saw a cute blonde wave at him.

"Perfect" he said sarcastically as she started to walk over.

She sat down in the bar stool next to him.

"I'll have whatever he's drinking." She turned to Dean. "I'm Lydia."

"Good for you."

"What's wrong with you?" she said touching his shoulder. "Can I make it better?"

" You're barking up the wrong tree,honey." He said holding up his left hand to show his wedding band.

"She doesn't have to know. Obviously she doesn't appreciate you or else you'd be with her. I mean she's probably already cheating."

She had just voice what'd he'd been afraid to think. Was Cas cheating on him? The thought caused him physical pain.

"Let me help you. " Lydia leaned in and her lips met Dean's who was frozen.

"Dean?"

He pushed her off to see a his beautiful angel standing in front of him with his trenchcoat half on as a tear rolled down his cheek.

*Cas*

Dean's words replayed in Cas' head. He sat on the floor. He missed Dean, and he loved Dean. He would not lose him. He grabbed his trenchcoat and left the apartment. He ran down the stairs and got outside just in time to see the Impala swerve away, but he ran after it. He had never ran faster in his life but still the car drove out of his sight. He stopped to catch his breath.

Where would Dean go. He knew, the nearest bar. Cas thought where it would be and then started to run. The cold air nipped at his face. He saw the bar and the Impala was parked outside. He ran in panting. He was going to tell Dean how much he loved him. He pushed passed tables with drunk people who glared at him. He saw his Cherry. He opened his mouth to call him name but before he could speak a girl leaned in a kissed him. He felt his eyes start to water.

"Dean?"

The boy turned and looked at him. Sure enough Dean's green eyes stared back at his. He felt a warm tear escape his eye. He wiped it and ran out. He started running the path he had taken there. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't think. He felt his knees give in as he hit the hard cement.

He let out a breath and let the tears fall. He heard a car stop next to him. Dean climbed out and pulled Cas into a hug. Cas tried to wiggle out but he couldn't.

"It's not what it looked like Cas. "

Castiel stood there stiff and silent. Finally Dean's grip loosened and Cas climbed into the passenger seat of the Impala. Dean got in on the driver's seat and drove slowly back to the apartment. An awkward silence filled the car. Maybe Cas would wake up and this would be a nightmare. Please let this be a nightmare.

They parked the car and Cas quickly stomped up the stairs. Dean kept up, though. He opened the door which he had left unlocked and picked his phone up from the counter. He walked to the bedroom and slammed the door.

"Yes, this is Castiel. I had a personal problem and couldn't make it in." He paused listening to the other end.

"I understand. Won't happen again."

He hung up the phone and stood still for a second. He felt his eyes tear up again. He gripped his phone so tight his knuckles turned white. He wanted to scream and hit a wall. Dean was supposed to be his. What would've happened if he hadn't shown up? Dean would've done more then just kissed her.

He grabbed Dean's pillow off the bed and opened the door. He used all his strength to throw the pillow at him.

"Cas."

"No! No, Dean! You do not get to talk to me right now! " He yelled.

"Please."

"No." His voice was more of a whimper now. "I will believe you and I will forgive you. And I don't want to. I don't want to because it hurts Dean, so much. You do not get to talk to me."

He paused as he felt tears go down his cheek.

"Two years ago you promised, you married me, Dean. You promised," he stuttered through sniffles. "You, you promised that you were mine. Only mine. "

He walked quietly in the bedroom and shut the door quietly. Dean heard the lock click.

*Dean*

He stood still in the darkness for awhile. He loved Cas more then anything, he never wanted to hurt him but he had. He wanted nothing more then to storm in there and wrap his arms around him. Tell him it was okay, that he had no attraction to that girl. That he can't even remember her name. That he only loved one person. And that person was Castiel Winchester.

He picked up his pillow and sat against the door to the bedroom. And gripped his pillow tight. He can't lose his angel. Not today, not ever.

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