Crying for the moon

My eyes shot open, an electric pain shot through my back as I attempted to move my body out of my bed.  The room was cold and I curled into myself in attempt to find solace in my body heat. I could feel the beast inside of me becoming restless, it sensed something that I did not, that I could not.

                        "Rachel!" The concerned shout of my half brother was enough to make me ignore any sort of pain inside me to address the problem of getting up and over to the door.   "Rachel I really need you to open your door." I ignored the loud racket of Charles attempting to turn my door knob again and again.

       Silently I went to the door and unlocked the safety lock, apparently my attempts and opening the door were unsatisfactory because after he heard the second lock click Charles thrusted the door open and ran into the chilled room. "Rachel we need to talk, I heard something horrible....terrible even, I don't know how to tell you." Honestly I had never seen my brother this rigid, this distraught. He was the picture of perfection in the packs' eyes, some expected him to become alpha when Alpha Nick dies.

           "Chuck, please, can you slow down?" The words come out hoarse, was I screaming last night? Apparently I was not the only one who noticed because Charles stopped short and took me in, my black hair was probably a mess but his eyes were focused on my exposed legs and arms. I gasped when I looked at the large yellowed bulges coming out from what look like the joints on my arms.

"Hell, Rachel my god, I've only seen this kind of shit with 12 year olds if they don't submerge into their beast within the first week of adolescence...." He didn't finish his thought but I knew what he was thinking. I never submerged into my beast, I never once felt the urge to change, only the pain of changing. After a month of my no show beast the pack labeled me as the runt and I became the ultimate bottom of the pecking order, It was because of my idiot wolf that I was in this situation and it is because of my idiot wolf that I scream in my sleep.

"Rachel...I simply don't have time to deal with all of this, the alpha has commanded for your disconnection, father is dead, the beta is on his way right now and he'll if he finds you you're as good as gone!" Charles panic all of a sudden didn't seems so annoying.

"Does this mean, what kind of disconnection Charles? Are they going to make me battle the alpha? Or are they just going to make me go rogue? Shit Chuck! I'm scared!" I started shaking, searching Charles concerned face for any information, my mind was going in over drive, what was I going to do? Shit!

My panic was cut short by another shock of pure pain in my chest, I fell down to the cool sodden ground.

"Rachel? God what is going on with you these days?" I waved him off, "just answer my question Chucky." Panic was setting into my bones and it was wearing my patience down.

"I don't know! I only stayed long enough to hear the Beta's orders to bring you to town square! We need to go Rachel! Or we need to get you out, please! I can't watch you die!"

I heard the slam of our front door being opened, "It's too late, get out of here, Beta James is already here." Charles' face turned blank, he stood up and took a step back and though all I wanted to do was hide behind him! I stood and opened the door, it was funny, when my mind was set on protecting Charles from being associated with me I just didn't feel any pain any more. I pushed the door open to reveal the charmingly old and cracked face of Beta Nick.

"Mutt, follow me. Now," his voice carried the heavy weight of a command relayed from the alpha and no matter how long it lasted, I was still under the command of Alpha. A fact that I kept to myself was though I easily heard the strength of an alpha command, I never had the compulsions that every other pack member talked about. So, I obeyed, there were enough things making me alienated by the pack and I didn't need another.

Following the command like my beta asked, I followed him out of my house, almost ignoring the usual distasteful scorn he would shout at me whenever I was alone with him.

" look at you, you look like you haven't eaten in days, and your hair! What are you doing putting feathers in your hair like some sort of irritating Indian, you do realize that your image reflects on us? He'll even if your status were higher no moon-flake pack member would want you, I can see the cheek bones poking out of your face-" he continued on to criticize my looks, a strange thing to zero in on until we etched the center of the village.

The village center was a large circular stage, around the stage where the high status houses, among them was the pack house and the alpha's house. Infact, the entire village encircled the one stage where everyone seemed to be now. I walked past the faces of children that I had played with when I was young and teachers that had attempted to teach me skills to be a productive pack member, they all wore the same distant expression, none of them giving away to me what they were thinking. Of course, in their minds I'm no longer one of them.

I was lead onto the stage, not quite knowing what to expect alas I faced the great Alpha Jack, the man who is going to either shun or murder me.