These Words

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Fat.

Ugly.

Stupid.

Usless.

These words,

They're the words that my mind speaks.

The words that everyone says.

No one understands.

When I look in the mirror,

And try and try and TRY to call myself beautiful, 

I nearly cry a thousand tears.

I can't lie to myself.

I can't say anything positive anymore.

Because the words pushed me down like a ton of bricks

Those sticks

And those stones,

they do hurt me, yes.

But everyone who said that these words can't, 

Are lying.

These words race through my mind like cars on a race track.

They dig their way into my thoughts and break down every ounce of confidence I had.

These words are simply my distroyers,

Nothing more,

Nothing less.

They're the words I hear no matter where I go.

These words do nothing but cause me pain.

They make me do the things I never wanted to do.

These words make me hungry for art.

Not the art you see in Art Galleries.

But the art you see on wrists.

These words 'cause lust for starvation.

Making me eat no more than maybe a crumb a day.

These words simply crumble up my innocence,

My childhood,

And make me grow up.

They make me loose control of who I really am.

Am I shy?

Am I outgoing?

I'll never know.

These words are my demons.

They're the demons I can't get rid of.

The monsters that I thought, when I was little, were hiding in the closet

Or under my bed.

But really.

These words are always glued in my head.

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