I was only 13 when it all started I got thoughts all the time I new they were wrong to think about but it never changed I would think to my self why do you think this way why can't you just be normal like everyone else around you why can't you be like every other teen but I wasn't and I certainly was not proud of it I was 15 now. I thought to myself everyday oh it's gonna get better but does it really No I think to my self why... just why do I try anymore really but then I think about all of the people around me that love and care deeply about me and I just let it go but that never changes the way I feel I would think about it everyday and every night my nights sounded like this I would go to bed at 12 and end up waking up 3 hours later I truly hatted being tired I despised it. Today is Thursday so I have to go to school I would kinda look forward to school I would get to see my best friend Tess she knows everything about me. She is always there if I need a shoulder to cry on and I am always there for her she is my rock. It was 7:14 I usually got up at 7:15 so I would have 15 minutes to get up and get around for school my little brother usually takes forever just to get ready and he is a boy like what boy takes that long I could see it if he was 16 or 17 but he is 12 but my sister is no better I usually take 14 or 15 minutes to get ready but everyday I would tell myself " should I tell my mom that I like crap or should I go to school I usually just go to school so I can stay cought up with all my school work because everyday I am sad and just giving up but Tess always keeps me going. So I was all ready for school I got into the truck and sat there until I saw my mom , sister and brother come out and then I put my headphones in to block out them I didn't really care what they had to say. When we arrived at the school I jumped out and put my heavy bag on almost like there where bricks in my bag but I would carry it. It was now 7:38 and I saw Tess I heard her yell my name and I looked at her as she walked towards me I just stood there with a dumb look on my face she said " hey are you okay do we need to talk?" She had concern in her voice I just said " no it's okay" I needed to talk but I didn't want her day to be ruined by what I said I already ruined her week. It was first period and I had math I didn't really mind that class the teacher was pretty cool she just let us do whatever so I would get the work done while I would listen to my music. I heard the bell and grabbed my bag and put it next to my seat cause I had her class again next. I never saw Tess when I went to siminar I never do I heard the 1 minute bell and walked to my class I sat next to this girl I was not real fond of she was kinda the annoying type but if I would ignore her she would ignore me. Seminar class was only 30 minutes the bell rang and I went to English I really enjoyed that class. Today was my favorite day especially because we got to sit down with our books and listen to music I usually just listened to my depressing music and read one of Tess's books her books are the only reson I get excited anymore. The bell rang and I was ready to go home already I was tired and tired of the morons at the school so it was time for me to go to 3 period that class was okay I mean what class can u like really so I finished the rest of the day up and I was in world geography and it was 3:53 and I was waiting for that clock to say 4:00 and the teacher said okay I will let you guys have free time now it was now 3:58 I was waiting by the door ready to go home and then I heard that amazing sound the bell I was walking done the halls and I saw Tess I was said " hey can you text me tonight I need to talk to you " she said with concern " what is going on?" i said "I will tell you in messages" she says "ok?" We both swap out love you and good byes and I walk outside and I saw my blue pickup drive into the parking lot I hopped into the back and we went home .
