Never Say Goodbye

Part Three: Life After You

Chapter 22

I venture to the fort, and I immediately burst into tears.

So this is when reality finally hits. Allie is gone. Mother evicted her.

I can feel myself trembling. My eyes are flooding with tears, and I can feel my heartbeat accelerating and it is so loud I can hear it.

I run into my bedroom that Doug and I made. The fact that we made it together breaks me down even more. He is the best adult figure I have ever had in my entire life.

On the mattress I see two huge plastic boxes with a piece of paper on top.  It was a letter from Allie.

Tanner,

These past few days have been amazing, having you live at my house. It makes me wonder what life will be like when we live together when we get older. Right now I don't even want to think about what will happen when you get to your house.

I love you so much, Tanner. More than words can describe. We will be together again; I will guarantee you of that. I won't let this destroy us.

I have loved every minute that I spend with you, every day of my life. You are the reason for my breathing. I will not stop trying to find you until I stop breathing. You are the reason I survive every day.

So, you probably noticed that I wasn't around as much as I could have been. I was preparing these boxes, Tanner. In one box is food, drinks, and your favorite things. I bought a water filter so that you can get water from the river and filter it so you'll be able to drink it. I put some of our frying pans in there, too (don't tell my dad). You can cook food over the fire if you want too. I gave you food that wouldn't go bad for a while, like potatoes and stuff. You can boil water and make noodles, too. I put those in there because I now how much you like noodles.

The other box has things for you to do. I put paper, chalk, pencils, crayons, notebooks, and things like that. Who knows, maybe you'll grow up to be a famous artist from drawing so much when you're out here. Maybe you can write to me, write letters and what not. I don't even know how you would get them to me, but I want you to write letters to me saying what you do out here. I can read them when I see you again.

   I already made sure that your winter things were out here. I cannot have you go cold out here. I took some more of my dad's clothes for you to wear. I know that he'll probably get mad but I can't have you be suffering. You have suffered enough and you shouldn't have to suffer out here. The fort is your safe haven, and it was mine also. The fort should not be a place of suffering.

I won't stop until we're together again, Tanner.

I love you,  

Allie

Attached to it was a picture; a picture of Allie, sitting on her back porch, looking out at the mountains. Her blonde hair looked darker, the way the sun hit it. She looked truly beautiful. Allie is the definition of perfect.

Mother took away the only good thing in my life. I know that for a fact. Doug told me his frustration with this whole thing and he was so confused because he always paid the bills. If not with money from the checking account, they would dip into Allie's college fund because she isn't even positive that she wants to go to college, but just in case she did, Jane put away money towards Allie's college.

Things just didn't add up.

The tears stop coming. It has gone to a numb pain now. The reality has just made me uncaring about the things going on around me.