Innocent as you- (lzayas' love-'shizaya')

This is my fault

Present time - Izayas' Pov

                 I wear a black suit and look at my reflection on the mirror...I'm really mess.But I don't care about it now because I don't care about my face or body anymore..My head and my heart hurt badly..My mind screaming to me 'GO AND DIE..THIS IS YOUR FAULT SO DIE..'I must be the one who deserve to die.. then why miyami?

I walked out of apartment like a zombie. I have to go to the church for see her. I really love her.she was the only one who understand me and love me back.I haven't fortune to keep her by my side.But I am the one who kill her..When enter the church I saw her sleep in the coffin like an angle. I wanna hug her and tell 'I love you'. But before I close to her someone grab my arm. It's namie..

"What the hell?? What are you doing namie?" 

namie looked at me and dragged me to the corner of inside of church. She turn around.

"Why are you come here??You are the one who deserve to die then why was she died..This was your fault..Do you know the reason I am not shout here or hit you to death?.. If I shout here or take a action for you that will disgrace for her death.So please.... can you leave?" Namie was told me mix emotional voice .So she has feeling too.

"Please namie..I beg you.I wanna see to her last time.I will leave Japan tomorrow.I can't live here anymore.please I beg you.I will never meet you again and later I will leave a message to shiki san.I am quite from the job. If she hadn't met me she will be alive. This is my fault.I am not to be loved.If you are going to shot me I don't care I wanna see her last time.."

Namie look at me and release my hand. "I can see, you really love her that's why I give a chance.Did you get it??"

I nod and slowly near to miyami s' body..She sleeping like an angle.I touch her hand.They cold like ice. She was warm before.I miss her warmth.

"I am sorry..I couldn't protect you. That day you weren't the one who die, the one who deserve to die is me, not you.I am sorry..to be worthless..I love you"

Tears are rolling down my cheeks.I can't see her like this..I wanna see her heart warming smile and cheerful voice..I wanna see you are annoying me like before..I wanna see her beautiful blue eyes Looking at me..I miss you...I really really miss you...I Put down the white roses that I had brought to her. 

"You are like white roses.Thats why I brought them to you...Good bye love I am sorry"

I walk away from her.I wanna disappear. now world just grave yard to me. First I must kill verona. I will kill her..she must die.

'izaya san can you promise me you are not going to hurt anyone anymore..''

Ok.. I promise you miyami...'

'you promise me.If you break promise I won't talk to you'

"Why now I remember that promise..Now I don't care about that I was promised you or not...You are not here anymore..So you can't do anything If I break the promise..At least you are not talk to me anymore..you are one who break the promise.." Namie look at me with surprise eyes..

"I'm sorry izaya" Namie pat my shoulder. I carelessly nod my head 

"Izaya I have to give you something.." namie Told me suddenly..

"What? now??? I am going now Namie..I don't wanna See anything.Sorry...Good bye" I Walked away from her. But some thing hit my head.

"Aaaaaww, Why are you hit me namie??" When I asked from her, she give me a little box.

"Miyami told me to give this to you..If she die..Don't ask questions from me..I think answer is in that box " She told me. I looked at her..What the hell is she telling me.

"What the hell are telling me? why was she gave you a box?? She didn't know what will happen in future.." I yelled at her.

"I don't know izaya..That why I was telling 'the answer is inside of that box'"Namie Told me..I looked at her blankly...

"Thank you namie. Then take care..Good bye" I told her and grab little box tight.. and I come out from the church.

"Izaya...." namie called me "aaaaaaahhhhh now what??" I asked from her.."She smiled me...

"You are change..Sorry for your lost.." I nodded and smiled her with sorrowfully.. and walk away from everyone.

Shinra Pov

"I am sorry for your lost yagiri san" I told her..She nodded and look at me. She is change little bit...Because of this girls' death??

"Kishitani san, you don't know anything about miyami s' death..Am I right??" She asked me suddenly.

"Yes..yagiri san..I don't know about it..Why are you asking?" I asked from her.

"Do you know she died at shinjuku.." She told me and give me a sharp look.Wait..SHINJUKU..Then,

"Was Izaya the one who killed her?? If he was the cause for her death I'm sure now he is laughing to death" I said to her.Yep that must be him.But she death because gun shot..Any way that doen't matter he is despicable after all.

"No kishitani san..in thats point part you have been wrong..He was the one who cause she die.But he not happy..She was his girlfriend."