It's Too Late (Septiplier)

11.

~Jack~

I opened my droopy eyes and lifted my head up. I started to stretch when I came face to face with Mark. I could feel my face growing hotter.

This was quite awkward. We were in the same bed together. Something that my mind is making a lot more awkward than it needs to be. Mark probably isn't thinking too much about it. I just need to calm down and try to act cool about it. 

Of course I didn't act cool about it. We only stared at each other for a bit, not saying a word. Well that's how it was anyway until Mark had the guts to get out of the bed.

He lifted the covers and slid his legs out, revealing that he only has boxers on. I could feel my face get even more red, if that was even possible.

However, no matter how awkward it was, I couldn't help but think how goddamn sexy he looks. The shirt falling around him perfectly. His muscular build and his messy morning hair. Oh god, what am I thinking.

I shake my head, trying to clear my head of these thoughts. I know I have feelings for guys but that's not the issue right now. It's that I finally have a friend and I don't want to get rid of him with whatever's in my mind right now. And besides, even if I did like him, he's straight, so try to keep your gayness inside okay Jack?

I then realize that Mark is staring at me.

"What's up?" he asked, concerned about my behavior.

"Nothing, I just have to use the bathroom," I say as I bolt up and run into the bathroom. I close and lock the door. I then lean against it and start sliding down against it. Once I reach the floor, I rest my head in my hands.

"Jack why do you have to be such an idiot," I whispered, "why do you have to think like this?" I sigh as I rub my face. I stay in there trying to clear my head of his sexiness.

"He's a friend Jack, nothing happened last night." I whispered once again. Then I heard a knock on the door and I tensed up when I heard Mark's voice through the wooden door.

"Jack are you okay in there?"

"Yeah."

"Once you come out of there I would like to talk to you about something." I started to panic. What did he mean? What did I do last night to make him want to have a talk with me? He sounded serious, it must be something serious.

All those thoughts rushed through my head as I reluctantly push myself off of the ground. I reach for the handle and slowly turn it and push the door open. I don't look at him as I ask him,

"What is it?"

"Jack, come here," Mark said as he motioned to the door to his room. We entered and he closed the door behind us. He sat down and patted the bed as if to tell me to sit down next to him. I did so and he started to open his mouth to speak.

"Jack, last night I was woken up by a scream, which I found came from you. I got up to comfort you and sat down with you. You told me it was a nightmare, but that's not the point of this. The point is after you fell asleep, I felt something on your arm." I tensed up as he paused and he looked directly at me.

"They felt like cuts, Jack." I felt like I was going to cry as he gently grabbed my arm. I wanted to pull away, but there was not point. Either way it would confirm his thoughts. He turned over my arm and saw a few of them that the t-shirt wasn't covering.Mark's face twisted up when he saw the few that are visible. He bit his lip and sighed. 

"Jack, why did you do this to yourself?" he asked me with a worried expression plastered on his face.  I said nothing because I felt extremely guilty, and because I had more than the ones he could see.

"Jack, please say something." Still I said nothing.

"Why did you do this to yourself?" Mark asked again.

"Because, I deserved it," I mumbled. Mark shook his head and said,

"No, no you didn't." I wanted to argue because I know that I'm like a pimple, or ants in the house. No one wants me. No one cares, well, I guess everyone except Mark.  However, I did not say these things because I knew it would only be a waste of breath. Mark would counter it by telling me that I matter in this awful world that we live in. Well, he might not say the last part.

I focused back in on Mark, who is still waiting for a depressing counter to his argument. Thankfully for him, he won't get one.

"Jack, aren't you going to say anything?" He asks.

"I will feel even more guilty if I do," I say under my breath.

"What do you mean Jack?"

" I mean that, I feel bad you have to see this. I also feel guilty that," I pause, not sure if I can tell him this.

"What is it Jack? If it's important, or even if it's not, please tell me." Mark looks at me, being very attentive, when I feel his hand slip into mine. I tried my hardest to keep the heat from flowing to my cheeks and continue talking. It hardly worked, I had a slight dusting of pink across my cheeks as I talked.

"Mark, please don't be mad at me when I tell you this," I sighed.

"I could never be mad at you Jack," Mark's sweet voice rung inside my head as he said this. I looked down, making sure I wouldn't meet his gaze when I spoke.

"Mark, those cuts you saw aren't all of them." After I said that, I felt him slowly lift up the sleeve of the shirt to my shoulder. His hand hovered there for awhile and he was silent except for the occasional shaky breath.

I then turned my head scared to see the expression on his face. When I saw him, he looked as if he was about to cry. He seemed so hurt that I did this to myself. It made me feel even more guilty.

After a long silence, he spoke.

"Jack, promise me that you will stop."

"I'm sorry Mark, but I can't make any promises."

HOLLLLLLLLY SHIIIIIIT! I updated, FINALLY! I know I haven't updated in about two weeks, but school. No but seriously, I had a bajillion projects and strange weeks and kind of being semi-social. I know, surprise right. And not to mention depression and anxiety and stress. All things that have been going on for awhile now but it's not like anyone actually cares. Anyway enough excuses, when I came back to this though I got a pleasant surprise. 1k people have read this book! It has grown so fast, and why would anyone would want to read a shitty book made by an almost 14 year old girl who doesn't update on time. The answer is I have no clue. Also before I end this you might be wondering why this is going up on a Saturday instead of a Sunday. Well, tomorrow is my birthday and I'm going to be busy tomorrow because of it. And I also have Monday off (Thank you presidents day) and so I might update then. One last thing (I know this authors note is super long) what is your opinion on the whole "Pewdiepie is an Anti-Semitic/Disney thing?"  Honestly, my opinion is that the entire thing could be handled better by the entirety of the people involved. Pewds could have used a better way to prove that the website is shit, the media could have used the correct contexts in their writing, and the people who are arguing about supporting him or not could stop shitting on other people because of their opinions. Well anyway, thank all of you for reading and I hope you enjoyed.