"Aren't you gong to get any food?" Michelle to the right of me in the line asks.
"No I'm not that hungry I feel a bit sick." I lie. In my mind I can just remember all the name calling. All the notes left in my bag. All the nights I cried myself to sleep.
"Oh ok." She smiles. "I have some medicine in my bag if you want some?"
"No it will be alright. Just a few more periods till I'm home." It's easy at school because I'm distracted but it's harder at home.
We walk away from the BakeHouse and make our way down the street. In the same path as other kids going to get their lunch.
We walk into a shop and walk around to the confectionary aisle. I walk straight past the food and go to the drinks. I grab a bottle of juice and go and pay for it.
〰➿〰
"So 3x-y+4xX9 is?" The teacher asks the class, I doubt anyone will answer him.
The class is dead silent. Then all of a sudden I feel my stomach about to gurgle. I quickly start coughing loud and dramatically.
Saved it.
I grab my water and chug it down, the boy next to me gives me a concerned look.
"Super thirsty, I forgot I had water." I laugh awkwardly.
20 more minutes. 20 more minutes of hunger. 20 more minutes of social anxiety.20 more minutes of hell.
I hear the teacher talking but I push it to the back of my head and look out the window while twiddling my pen in my hand.
I could have a chicken salad. That won't hurt as much will it?
〰➰〰
My legs ache and my throat burns. The bathroom stinks and my hands and face are covered in salivated sick.
I feel tears in my eyes from the burn in my throat. It won't stop, it just keeps coming up.
I put two of my fingers under the tap and let the cold water rinse over them. I take them and put them down my throat as far as I can. I feel my gag reflexes make my body jut and it comes up. I start coughing from the burn. I stand up and flush the toilet. Quickly I wash my hands while brushing my teeth.
