Please Don't Go

9th February 2017

Chunji takes off his jacket and scarf, throw them away to a corner of his room then throw himself to the bed.
He covers his head with pillow, so he can hear nothing from the world outside.
His heart is hurt.
His brain turned off.
He doesn't want to think nor doing anything right now.
He just want to closes his eyes, fall asleep and when he wakes up it will be a different day. A day that just like before. A day that he used to have. A day that far before 9th February 2017.

Chunji closes his eyes.
He doesn't fall asleep, but it feels like he does.
It feels like a dream.
He opens his eyes and find himself, on his room but not where he was before.
Its his old room at their dorm. With the noises from the next room, two maknaes arguing about something, probably something stupid just like everyday.
Chunji walks out and find the two sitting on their bed, focusing on their phones.
"Going somewhere hyung?" Asked Changjo.
Chunji smiles and shakes his head.
He continues walk out of the room and closes the door behind.
He bites his lip. He feels happy but somehow he knows its not true.

He moves to the living room, heart thumping. He walks slowly and it feels like his heart escaping his body when the place he's heading to is empty.
Chunji's eyes begin to become teary.
"L.Joe." he whispers to the empty bed at the corner.

"Oh hyung still awake?"
Chunji turns to see Niel comes from kitchen.
"Hyung hungry? I made some ramyun if you want." He offers the bowl.
"I'm not hungry. Ahn Daniel where's Byunghun?"
Niel sit on the chair and looks surprised by the question.
Chunji's eyes squint.
"He will be back at 11 you said, hyung? It's only 10."
Chunji let out a sigh.

He walks to the bed and curls in.
"Did something happen hyung?" Asked Niel from across the room.
Chunji shakes his head.
"Did you have a bad dream? L.joe hyung said you had bad dreams lately."
Chunji nods faintly.
Maybe it's just a bad dream he said to himself.
"Hyung you should go back to your room. L.Joe hyung will be dead tired when he comes and you don't want him to sleep on the floor right?"
Chunji let out a deep sigh and sit.
"I'll let him know that you're looking for him when he come back, so please go back to your room and get some sleep."
Chunji nods and walk like a zombie back to his room.
"Please tell him to come to my room, Niel."
"Don't worry I will."

Chunji lays down on his back, but he doesn't close his eyes. He's afraid if he closes his eyes and fall asleep, he will wake up and find out all that happen just a dream. He wants to wait for L.Joe. He need to talk to him.

Chunji reaching for his phone and browse the gallery.
So many pictures of him and the members. Most of them are his and L.joe's selca.
A single tear escape his eyes without him knowing, followed by another tears that he end up crying.
He was crying so hard so he didn't know that someone entering his room.

He felt a weight on his bedside and he opens his eyes.
L.Joe, sitting on his bed, looking at him with worried look.

"What happen Chanhee?"
L.Joe's voice runs through his ears that makes him jump and hug his bestfriend tightly.
Chunji's tears fall down again.
He can feel L.Joe's hand rubs his back and he's whispering words to comfort him.
"Everything's gonna be okay. I am here with you, Chanhee, so please stop crying."
Chunji grabs the back of L.Joe's shirt.
He shakes his head.
"Hey, tell me what's going on."

"D-don't leave me...b-byung..." Chunji stutter between his sobs.
"I'm here, I'm not going anywhere."
"N-no you liar. Y-you'll leave us...y-you'll leave me!"
Chunji cries out loud.
He can feels L.Joe tighten his hug.
"After all this time...you'll leave? How about the group? How about the members? How about me?"

L.Joe's shoulder soaking wet with Chunji's tears.
"Stop crying, your eyes will be swollen tomorrow."
"There's no tomorrow without you, Byunghun, no tomorrow without you."
"Hey I'm not going anywhere. Look at me Chanhee. I'm here, I'm still here, and I will be here tomorrow."
"No you're not. You'll leave us soon. You...you hurt me so bad." Chunji keeps on crying.

"More than 7 years. You always be there...you never leave my side. Why now? Why? After all we've been through? Can't we work it out? Anything but leaving, please?
I can't stand being alone without you.
No, Byunghun. Please don't go. I will do anything as long as you don't leave. Please?"

Chunji doesn't hear any sound from L.Joe so he opens his eyes.
And he's crying even more.
Lying on his own bed, hugging his pillow.
L.Joe isn't there
He's not at their dorm.
He's back.
To the 9th day of February on 2017.

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I'm crying while typing this. I hope its just a dream. I still can't believe L.Joe filled a lawsuit to terminate his contract. 9th february will always be a dark day for every Angel in the world if he really leaves Teen Top.