Band aids don't fix bullet holes (Rachel

9-WHY?!

Rachel POV

I woke up the next morning remembering exactly what my plan was today. Die. Pretty simple plan but I need to get this done soon because of the whole "meltdown in front of Gabbie" situation, urgh I'm so emotionally weak!! I also need to write a suicide note. May as well start now, how should I start it:
Dear beloved family and friends?
Or
If you're reading this I'm long gone?
Hmmm the first one then I could go into the second one. I quickly write that down. So in the note I'll just talk about the abuse and how I can't take it. Now that's sorted how do I end it:
Don't grieve over I'm nothing to be sad about goodbye
Rachel?
Or
I know this was a selfish decision to kill myself. I did this for me and no one else. Another imperfection of mine.
It was nice knowing ya
Goodbye
Rachel?
I'm kinda thinking the second one. Ok let's get all this over and done with.
*skip if you don't want to read the note you'll see(*) when it's over*

To my beloved family and friends, if you're reading this that means I didn't chicken out and actually decided to go ahead and kill myself. Before anyone goes blaming themselves (Gabbie and Colleen!) it's not your fault it's Matt's. He has been abusing me for 6 months now I think and making me think I'm nothing but a blob of fat which I believe to the bottom of my heart, hence why I don't eat anymore. I guess the abuse has gotten worse and I can't deal with it anymore. So Colleen, now you understand about the seven second challenge thing and Gabbie, why I told you to tell no one. I'm so tired. Tired of talking, tired of laughing and tired of living. I decided to write a little bit to most of you reading this if anyone cares so here goes nothing:

Colleen,
Again don't blame yourself you couldn't stop it, don't become sad, stay the amazing older sister I have known my whole life. And keep the family together be the life of the party (presuming you make a party or something) but anyway I love you so so much
Rachel

Trent
Just I don't know where to start with you, just I love you and I know your brother protective instincts will kick in at some point and all I can say is I love you and try not to get arrested for murder,
Rachel

Chris and Jess,
Guys again not your fault and I feel guilty for making you have to explain to Bailey, Jacob and Parker about me no longer being there. Good luck with your new baby Jess!
Rachel

Mom and Dad,
You guys are amazing without you I wouldn't be the excuse of your child. I'm sorry for all the times we fought and the whole Dylan sleeping at our house in high school but just be there for each other and look after your grandkids they deserve more attention than me love you,
Rachel

Gabbie,
Hey Gabs don't blame yourself even though you knew. If you did tell someone I'm not mad and how can a corpse be mad, I could be your new ghost and get you another ghost story video. Just don't get the psychic twins getting rid of me yet!!! Thanks for keeping the secret love ya,
Rachel
Ps don't let my family give you crap about you knowing it was a sign of loyalty. 

Friends,
Hey everyone here we are me writing this note telling anyone who's been a good friend to me thanks. Thanks for putting up with my stupidity and annoyingness (I know that's not a word) thanks for putting up with me in general. This is it love ya,
Rachel

I know this was a very selfish choice to kill myself. I did this for me no one else. Another imperfection of mine. It was nice knowing ya, goodbye,
Rachel
*suicide note over*

A/n trigger warning suicide attempt (this is a very cheery chapter😂) also after the next part it will get more happier and less depressing sorry I got to write what I got to write. Okay back to the story....

Now that parts over I go to the kitchen and take the sharpest knife I could find. As soon as I found it I whispered a goodbye knowing that no one could hear me and raised the knife as I go to plummet it into my chest the blade gets knocked out of my hand. I look up and see Gabbie and Colleen. I start yelling at Gabbie who was holding the knife whilst Colleen was trying to calm me down

"WHY?! I WANTED TO DIE!! NOOOOO!! WHAT DID YOU DO?!"

"Sit down honey" Colleen says before forcing me down by hugging me.

"Why? Rachel why?" Colleen asks. I say nothing instead I take the suicide note and give it to her. She doesn't trust me so she changes places with Gabbie

"He did this didn't he. He caused this!" Gabbie said getting more annoyed every time she spoke

"Yes he did" at that moment guess who came running in? Matt.

"Baby what happened?!" He asked 'worried'

"Take one more step near my baby sister and I will kill you" Colleen said walking near me

"You told them didn't you?" He exclaimed at me

"No they walked in on me... erm me"

"Spit it out"

"Trying to kill herself because of you!" Gabbie screamed at him making him flinch but smirk.

"Wanted to die did you little Rachey? Don't worry I can help"
He grabbed the knife I was going to die with in my chest and raised it up. Somehow Gabbie moved me in time and Colleen recorded everything as evidence. When Matt realised he shoved Colleen and went to leave.

"Don't you dare touch my girlfriend as$hole!!" Gabbie exclaimed

Matt ran out of the house before Gabbie could lay a finger on him. Colleen phoned the police and they have caught Matt. And now Colleen is forcing me to see the therapist Gabbie sees.
Before I can refuse the nurses take me into the ambulance. I look out of the window and see Colleen mouth "sorry" what has she done?!

Colleen POV (yay)

Ok as annoyed as she's going to be I told the 911 woman everything and now Rachel is going to a place for the mentally unstable people because she has Depression and anorexia. She will be forced to see a dietician and therapist for the disorders. I know she will hate me but it had to be done now I have to explain the situation to the rest of my family. Great (!)

A/n there word count 1184 see told you the next chapter would be long as I promised. The next chapters will be shorter like 400/500 words unlike this one. And I hope you're still enjoying this book and I'll try to update but I need to sleep now so goodnight 🖤