You found me|Tyler and Ashley

But then i see you

There are rumours that are circling all over the Internet about me, about my family and friends. People saying that I don't care about the cast anymore and that I'm ungrateful. It upsets me because I owe my whole life to these people, and even right now if I'm not doing a great job of showing it they all mean the world to me. I just wish I could turn back time to when I'd be sitting in my dressing room with Shay and Tyler waiting to be called, and we would take silly snap chats or laugh hysterically about memories. I would do anything to have that back, to feel that loved again. But I can't and I have to except that.

Sometimes I'll just sit down and think about past memories with people and the person that springs to mind almost instantly is Tyler. Tyler Blackburn who's smile and brightness and cheer me up in a heart beat. He has no idea how much I miss him and I don't think I'll ever be able to tell him because I can never find the words.

I decided to go and get some coffee from this amazing shop on the corner of the street. It's honestly amazing but not as amazing as the Starbucks I used to have on set, making sure Lisa gets the right type to match my mood. She's one thing I miss annoying. I happily stroll down the road, I didn't mind the paparazzi today, I was feeling good, looking good I didn't mind anything. As I got to the coffee shop I quickly entered, my eyes scanned the room for any familiar sights. As my eyes returned I noticed a recognisable figure at the counter. I pulled my sunglasses off, let my eyes focus on the figure. A sense of happiness filled my body for a moment but it was soon replaced with dread and anxiety. I could feel my whole body suddenly go numb, I could here my heart beating against my chest, I knew I was at least alive. Hundreds of thoughts, feelings and emotions consumed my mind. I saw them start to move, shift away from the counter. Shit shit shit shit shit.
If I turn away now and walk away it would be like I was never here and I won't have to face this interaction. So I decided to swiftly make my way over to the door, just as I placed my hand on the metal, I was quickly pulled around in the other direction. I felt a tight grip on my forearm. My eyes slowly moved up his body, "still as toned as I remember" I thought to myself. As my eyes travelled up they were met with his dark chocolate orbs that could make anyone fall in love. He stared back at me with intensity written on his face.
"Hey" I managed to get out of my now dry throat.
"Hey" he said back pulling me into a tight hug, squeezing me so tight, I felt so safe. I've always felt safe around him, even when we weren't getting along he made me feel safe.
"What are you doing out here?" I said playfully
"You know uhh...." he said scratching the back of his neck.
"Business" he nodded
I replied with a pretty blank look on my face and the nod of my head.
I need to get out of here, I could fee the anxiety building up inside of me. Any moment I could start hyperventilating.
"Im sorry to cut this short but I really should be getting off, you know business" I said mocking him slightly, because I was quite annoyed.
He smirked.
"Yeah okay, see you around?"
"Yeah defiantly".

I rushed out of the shop, looking back over my should, my eyes met his again and he gave me a soft smile. Today was not the day to come face to face with him.