I spent all night
Browsing the web
For facts I'll never need,
Watching trailers for Assassin's Creed,
Surfing for a cute dog breed.
I looked at pictures of the stars,
And prices of vintage muscle cars.
I watched some old TV show,
Tried to find out when it would snow.
I learned what minerals make plants grow,
From a rainbow that said the more you know.
I played my music till the early hours,
I even watched some Austin Powers,
I learned a new cure for the flu,
And read some spoilers for Doctor Who.
I ordered myself some angel wings,
And other assorted Etsy things.
But then YouTube began to buffer,
The internet will make me suffer.
And so I sat and gave a groan,
My hands still clutched around my phone.
Waiting for it to return,
Having left for no reason I could discern.
I was there in the early morning,
Waiting for it to come back,
To be given a warning.
The bars flashed grey,
The buffer wheel spun,
The slow return had begun.
Hello wifi,
My dear old friend.
I knew you'd be with me,
Till the bitter end.