Love Me

Chapter 4

"How was Zara's barley?" Clara asked
"Went well same old stuff, you know." something was up with me, I had been having mega mood swings lately, but I intended on changing it. For a change Clara and I were going shopping and to be honest I hated shopping. I always went to shop with particular things in mind, not going to look for things am not sure.
Somewhere in my heart I had hoped to bump into Ken maybe even see him atleast from a far but as much as I wanted that, I knew I wasn't going to.
"Maybe he's just ignoring me." I randomly told Clara,
"Or maybe you are over thinking, don't forget you like over thinking."
We both knew she was just trying to he nice.
"He's probably busy or up to something" she later said
"Let's do this shopping thing before my feet start hurting" I rudely changed the subject.

Ken

This house was ever boring, my twin brother Kevin was always out of the house helping in dads company my little brother Kris was either at his friends place or having a church thing with mum, now it was just me and our nanny.
I wished Kate was around she always made the house lively, even mum loved having her around most of the time.
Since I came she's been asking me why Kate hasn't come to visit, wish I could tell her everything maybe she'd be able to give me advice but that would just make me a pussy.
Today I was going to see Andrew maybe he'd have some manly advice for me.
I dialled his number.
"What's taking you do long man." I wondered aloud.
"Hey bro, wssup?" he said.
"Hey, where you at?"
"I just left heading over to John's house, blaze up a little, why?"
"Just wanted to meet up chill you know, plus I need some advice brah"
"I'll pass by pick you up, we can head over at Johns"
"Cool"
Be there in fifteen"

Two heads are better than one, maybe they could both help me.
I went downstairs get a bottle of water.
I hanged out with the most weird friends,
Andrew liked to smoke weed, he would blaze up pretty much anywhere, not that he was addicted but he liked it alot, his mom doesn't even go to his room, I have trouble breathing in there, it's normally a chimney always full of smoke, lately he says he's at a better place, since I left for the coast he says he's done it tops four times which is major improvement.
John on the other hand alcohol was his bestie, yet the dad was a pastor ironic I know but he still drunk again but that he was an alcoholic but any chance he'd get to go out partying he'd use it and "use" it well.  The mum was super strict, most of the time if mum couldn't have it with us she'd tell us to go to her place for a sleepover , by the time we came back without us knowing we'd be back in line. Sometimes we wonder how he does it, he never tells the secret.

"Man what you still doing checking yourself out in the mirror?"
I automatically knew who it was this guy had the most inappropriate jokes ever.
"No need to take the car right, we could just walk."
"Yea sure"
This would give me more time to phrase my questions without sounding like a sissy or whopped.

Told nanny Ruth where I was headed because I knew mum would ask her.

John lived just two blokes away from us, so before knowing it we had already arrived, I really felt like a pussy having to tell me friends my problem, "God help me." I said oh so silently.

The conversation actually went better than I expected, John and Andrew were really supportive telling me to tell her about my feelings, Andrew with his jokes though he just couldn't stop "you gotta tap her though." he just won't let this go.
I had mad respect for her I wasn't going to force her if she wasn't ready not that I wasn't going to try.
My worry was if it really was going to work since we were both from different worlds to some extend plus what if she didn't like me. Sigh there was only one way to find out.

My boys and I had decided I do this next week to give me time to critically think about it.

Lord am I making the right decision? I couldn't stop asking.
I felt a whole lot of load lifted after talking to Andrew and John, I also couldn't stop thinking about what he had said though.

I decided to go to her place I had been avoiding her for far too long, maybe on my way to her place I could find an excuse I was going to use, maybe I was sick, had alot of work to do, maybe am in love with you, lol I was definitely not going to use that, it sounded better in my head than out loud for sure.
Walking to her place was better gives me more time to think as well, plus I hadn't taken a walk in a while her place wasn't really far.

About twenty minutes later I could see her house from where I was. She was standing outside her house, her back facing me, wait is that a guy. I have no idea why my blood was boiling I was beyond pissed, I was angry how dare she talk to another guy, I stood at a distance just so I could see how they'd be around each other, now they were laughing and he had his hand on her shoulder, it stayed there more than a minute, I had a thirst for punching him really hard.
Why was she even blushing, I wish I could read his lips what was he even saying, why was I being jealous in the first place, who was he anyway, aaargh I wanted to scream so bad, where is all this violence coming from jeez, why was I even being sad, I felt as though my hurt was broken, as if I was empty left alone, sad, hurt, how would I think she loves me, what was wrong with me.
I sure didn't see this coming he kissed her on the cheek, all so passionately, almost like he loved her. This was just disgusting, and even more, painful to watch.

John and Andrew decided to get over Kate we were going to the club and I was going to get laid, am not the type to go picking girls in clubs but today had to be an exception it wasn't really a big deal for me everyone thought I was a fuck boy so I might as well act like one.

I was on my sixth shot, we had already bought alcohol, and now that was my seventh shot, it was actually fun, for a fine boy I sure was getting all the ladies attention. The VIP section was less crowded, didn't smell cheap like the losers down there, with that thought I looked down at the "losers"

Those hazel eyes landed on me.

I looked away real fast, how was she here, most of all who was she here with, if she had that short guy with her again I was so going to beat him up, blame it on the alcohol.
Bad decisions.

Thank you guys hope you enjoyed

Sorry am not able to update frequently but will do my best

Don't forget to like hit that little star 👇

Comment comment comment.

Share as much as you can

Thank you for the support guys, you'll are the best

Till next chapter

Enjoy

Love,
W.M