Shattered Pieces

Tainted Thoughts

I awaken from my deep slumber to realize I'm in my own house and torcher chamber..

Was it all a dream? Am I safe now? Is today my birthday instead? What the hell happened?

I'm so sore as I crawl out of bed.. I inch my way to the mirror and notice bruises on my arms and face. The back of my head feels as if it's exploding.

It wasn't a dream.

I drag my feet across the frozen tile in the bathroom fore I fear the damage done.

I don't feel the same

I feel unclean

I feel more broken than before

I'm so alone

My clothes smell of him and my mind is infested with the slight memories of consciousness and falling in and out of a struggle where I had absolutely no control.

I open the medicine cabinet and reveal my blade hidden within my makeup bag. Dragging it across my skin and the blood beads up along the new opening. It exposes my demons and black blood to the outside world so they can be free for now and I can have a peace of mind. Relief. My love and need for blood is one thing I find eerily beautiful. My mind finally at ease and I got what I deserve.

I was so stupid.

What do I do now?

Should I go to the police?

No. You should just die. Everything has been taken away from you. You have nothing left and nothing else to be here for.

It can all be over soon.

But what if someone cares- just kidding. No one cares about my pathetic existence. Not since Kristie left. Not since Michelle pushed her over the edge.

You can join her. Go be with Kristie. Relieve yourself.

What about Casidee?

You don't actually think she cares about you, do you?

I don't know.

It'll all be over soon.

One last tear across my mangled wrist and the weapon I wield goes into hiding once again. The blood is a vibrant red against my ghostly, white skin. It ventures its way down my hand and drips into the sink. Crimson rivers spread across my arm and merges paths with the faint, pink reminders of earlier battles. All laying in perfectly symmetrical lines. My demon within finally shuts up.. For now.