Why doesn't anybody love me anymore? They think I don't know, they think I'm stupid, but I see the way they look at me, I notice the way they talk to me. They've stopped loving me, a long time ago, I know they have, family isn't forever. Nothing really is, even life is temporary. The only thing that seems to last forever for me is the sadness. I feel so alone, and lost, and scared of the things I might do to myself. I feel trapped in my own mind, I feel completely alone. My family doesn't love me, they're disappointed in me. That's all I am too them, a disappointment, a failure, a mistake.
Right now I can't calm my breathing down, or stop my hands from shaking, or my tears from flowing. I can't control anything anymore, not even my emotions, what a loser, hey? I want to rip my skin open, I want to feel on the outside what I feel on the inside, I want to see myself bleed. I'm hated by everyone but I don't think anyone can hate me more than I hate me.
I'm so ashamed of who I am.
