One shots // Wattys 2017 [COMPLETED]

Walmart receipt

Okay so mind you that I saw a commercial about these people creating a film on a Walmart receipt. I thought it was funny, so what the hell. I'm going to write a story. 

Walmart. A place where people came to shop for items at a fair price. The thought made me laugh. People. Creatures on two legs and wore.... clothes. Walmart had that, too!

I sat in my now forever home, waiting(DON'T BE A BURR) for someone to choose me. I know it may sound cheesey, but everyone wants this. 

I was brightly colored and bold in my shape. I couldn't talk, and I couldn't advertise myself. I wasn't very popular here, in fact, most thought I was weird, perverted, or just disgusting! This meant I was one of the only of my kind here. I tried to take pride in that, but it doesn't really work. I sigh in my "head," looking around. A person was approaching my aisle with an interested look on her face. I then saw another female run up to her from behind. She took her by the hand and excitedly pointed in my direction. This is it. I was going to a home. The first female smiled and nodded, making her way towards me. She picked me up! 'OH MY GOD THIS IS EXHILARATING!'  She placed me in the basket along with some other things in the aisle. They laughed a little and blushed. They made their way towards the checkout. This was my dream! 

I saw we finally made it to the front of the line. I was scanned, and the cashier looked questioningly at the two women taking me home. They glared at the man, waiting to move on. I was placed into the bag, along with the receipt soon afterwards. I was happy as I read it. It had said:

Chocolates           $2.48

lingerie                   $12.63

lingerie                   $12.63

lipstick                   $3.50

lotion                      $10.14

Dildo                       $17.95

total:                       $60.12

I was going home.

OKAY! WOW. WELL THEN. I don't know if Walmart actually HAS dildos? I don't really want to find out.......Ummmm.... this can, uhhh..... you know.... NOT! go all over the world? WATTPAD ONLY! Yeah. Uh.... thanks, I.... guess..... froggypope  Remember? ssssssssssssexxx #cardsagainsthumanity #sexsnakesflyingaroundatgrandmashouse haha

You know little dildo, you think going home was fun? Wait till later.....<3

I'll let myself out.....