the kink club • luke hemmings ✔️

07. the one where nobody signs up.

chapter seven:
the one where nobody signs up.

We all stare at Michael with our jaws to the floor. Not literally, of course, but the stunned expressions on our faces mirror that visual all the same.

"Michael?!"

"You guys?!" he repeats, his voice even louder and higher than all four of us combined. "What the hell are you doing here?!"

"What the hell are we doing here? What the hell are you doing here?!"

"Wha- I asked first!"

"Well, we asked second!" Bailey interrogated.

"Seriously. How the hell are you guys up here?"

"What, now we're at some super secret club nobody's supposed to know about?" Ashley asks, crossing her arms. Michael winces.

"Yes."

"Mike, what the hell is this place?" Chloe questions him, the assertiveness in her tone showing. "And why do you have porno posters all over the wall?"

"Look, you guys-"

"Is this where you guys go after 6pm?" I ask in disbelief.

Michael sighs, bowing his head in shame and looking down at the floor. "Yes."

"Where are the others?"

"Huh?"

"Luke, Calum, and Ashton," I stand up straighter, looking at him, the alcohol in my system only just now catching up to me. "Are they here?"

"Soph-"

"What?"

"Hold on, why am I trying to explain myself t you? You four shouldn't even be up here in the first place," Michael states, ignoring my previous question and opting for a diversion. "I can't just tell you things-"

"Michael, please." Bailey starts, immediately shutting him up. "If you're running a damn sex toy business, you might as well tell us now before we start our own and run you into bankruptcy." she finishes, using a warning tone. Ashley nods.

"That's right. I know where to get double-ended tentacle dildos, my boy, and I'm not afraid to use them!"

"Ash-"

"Double ended, I tell you!"

"I know, I know! I've seen them," Michael whines, leaning forward against the counter and resting his head in his hands. "Goddamnit. God freaking damnit, this wasn't supposed to happen,"

"Damn right this wasn't supposed to happen. I just always assumed you guys snuck off to have some four-way orgy every night, or something." Ashley tells him.

"What?!"

"Oh, don't act surprised. The sexual tension between you four idiots is astounding."

"There is no sexual tension!"

"Lies."

"You thought they were having collective orgies?" Bailey asks her, eyebrow raised in approval as Ashley shakes her head yes. "Come to think of it, that would be more realistic."

"Why? What did you think they were doing?"

"I don't know. For a while, I was convinced they were superheroes," says Bailey, cracking a wide grin. Then she pauses, eyes drifting over to look at me. "Then werewolves. Then vampires."