The Great Unexpected (SLOW UPDATES)

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"Eyes are useless when the mind is blind."

Unknown

Susannah Gonzales

She awoke to the sound of the alarm clock on her phone blaring. Screaming for attention like a needy child.

Looking through the cracks of the boards, she saw new additions to the collection of bullet holes painting the sides of the houses. Both the one she was in and the one next to it.

She knew that whoever had made the foolish mistake of shooting at the dealer was now long gone. The blood oxidizing on the wall behind whomever the person was confirming her suspicions.

Susannah supposed that she should have been sad. Sad that a life was lost, though they had tried taking one themselves. Sad that she had practically witnessed it. Sad that she slept through the gunshot that ended someone's life. But she couldn't. She couldn't feel anything, as only the living have emotions.

Such a hypocritical thing to think. As she was in love with a boy she could never have. Emotion. That's what love was. So, hypothetically, she could be sad about the death. But she didn't want to. She didn't want to think about the fact that maybe she could've stopped it. She knew it was going to happen. So she shut them off. Emotions, that is. Her love for the boy who had none was gone. Perhaps not gone, but forgotten. The death that had just happened outside of her boarded up window. Forgotten. The pain she felt every time her mother made her leave. Gone. For why would someone want to think of feel such things, when you could feel nothing at all?

Forgotten.

But not really.

And in all honesty, she wished she could forget. But the things you force yourself to forget, are the things you remember the most.

So as she pushed all the thoughts of death, love, and leaving to the back of her mind, they only made a round-trip back to the front.

She wanted to scream. Wanted to cry until all of her tears washed away the sins she had committed. But she wasn't weak. So she put on the mask of a stoic expression, and left the only building that she felt she could call home.

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Susannah made her way to school and, for once in her life, went to her classes. A cigarette couldn't smoke her grueling thoughts out of their home of her mind. She needed a distraction.

She entered her first class. A class she couldn't name for the life of her, but still knew the room.

The teacher checked attendance. The look of surprise littered on everyone's face when he uttered Susannah's name and was met with a reply, was, in Susannah's eyes, nothing short of hilarious. But she didn't laugh.

She listened to a teacher rambling on and on, but could still hear her thoughts pounding on her skull. And when the teacher called her out for not paying attention, a mistake on his part, she stood up, shoved her chair back under the desk, and slammed the door as she walked out. Back to the C hallway.

4/15/2017

«515 words»

A/N

So yeah, it's been a few months since I last updated (sorry) and I know if I start rambling about why, it'll sound exactly the same as my last author's note. So, again, I'm really sorry about not being able to update as frequently as I would like to. I hope you've all been having a great day, and I think that's all so, until next time.

~Brooke