You See But Do Not Observe

REMINDER

CHAPTER THIRTY THREE : REMINDER

Day 17. John suggested to Serena that she visit a therapist. She said no, and he left with his bags the next morning. Serena thought Sherlock really had taken their family with him.

Day 36. Serena got up from Sherlock's bed, used Sherlock's kitchen, sat in Sherlock's chair. Toby, Sherlock's dog, curled up next to her. She couldn't help it that everything reminded her of him.

Day 45. Serena realized that slowly, the flat was becoming less and less like Sherlock. The science equipment gone, everything tidier, the holes in the wall patched. Serena knew Mrs. Hudson was trying to help, but sometimes she wished she'd stop.

Day 59. John came by. He had been living with his sister for the past two months, but he visited that day. He was better. Serena was better. They could finally look at each other in the eye. Toby went ballistic when he saw John. John stayed the night. He was worried about her being alone, she could tell. He knew how noisy thoughts could get when it was dark and there was no one to wrap an arm around you.

"I don't want you on your own." He told her.

"I know you don't."

"I'm tired of living at Harry's anyways."

"The extra bedroom is still open. Mrs. Hudson didn't sell it."

"Good. I'll get my stuff." John stood up to leave, but Serena caught his sleeve.

"I am glad you're coming back John. I don't like being on my own."

John looked back at her when he got near the door. "Have you thought about seeing a therapist?"

"No."

"I think you should. I did."

"It won't help. It's something I have to do alone."

"It's not true, Serena. It's not true. Otherwise, neither of us would stay in this apartment. It's friendship that helps you heal, not loneliness."

And just like that, they became a little broken family again.

Day 89. Serena had gotten back into her old routine. She visited with friends, went to work, laughed and smiled.

Lestrade had been going after Molly for weeks now. He asked Serena for advice, and she just smiled over their lunch.

"Just ask her on a date. It's just a date."

"I dunno."

"Trust me, Greg, do it now. Later it might be too late. Enjoy it while you can." Serena told him.

He looked into her eyes. "How are you doing?"

Serena looked back instead of avoiding his gaze. "Healing."

Day 102. Serena was cleaning the flat when she found Sherlock's old violin. She remembered him playing it for her, them getting drunk together, a single episode of Doctor Who. She could've grown old with him, always off to have an adventure, to not be boring.

She could look at the dusty instrument without crying. She still felt sad, but not only because he died. Because he left a trail of destruction and reminders behind. Because he took one of her futures away from her. And she still loved him.

She picked up the violin and tried to play. Toby perked up his ears and cocked his head. His eyes kept watching as Serena swung the bow over the strings. And it hurt. But it was a good kind of hurt.