Undecided

~Chapter 1~

" Mom, can you please turn the music down?" I say looking at the passing trees out the car window. I really didn't feel like listening to George Michael's "Careless Whisper" single for what seemed like the hundredth time since entering the car. It's not that I don't like the song it's just that I don't feel like hearing about relationships and cheating. I already know about the latter all too well.

" Ah, come on Jade this is a classic!" my mom says while thankfully turning down the volume.

We are on our way to Florida for our annual two week beach trip. Any other year I would be excited and couldn't wait to arrive at the beach. This year is a little different. My boyfriend, oh excuse me, ex boyfriend Jasper was coming along on the trip but a lot can happen in one night.

~ Flashback two days before beach trip ~

Jasper and I are currently at my friend Makenzie's party. She throws a party every Friday night since her parents are never home and she is filthy rich.

"Brianna!! Makenzie!!" I shout spotting my friends over by the drinks. I quickly walk over to them assuming Jasper would follow.

" Hey Jade!!! Where have you been?" Brianna says.

" I was starting to think you weren't coming." Makenzie says.

Makenzie, Brianna and I have been friends since middle school. We are like the three amigos. Makenzie plays softball and volleyball. She has hazel eyes, light skin, brown hair that comes to the middle of her back, and she is very outgoing. I don't think there is anyone who doesn't like her. Brianna is a cheerleader, not the preppy kind that's loud and obnoxious. She has shoulder length black hair, caramel brown skin, and dark brown eyes that look almost black. She shows little emotion and could care less if someone doesn't like her.

" I know I'm a little late, I had to wait for Jasper to get off of work." I say. They both scrunch their noses at the mention of his name. They don't like Jasper, they think something about him seems off.

I roll my eyes at their gestures. "Anyway, where are Jacob and Rick?" I say with a suggesting smile. Jacob is Makenzie's boyfriend of four years. They are the cutest couple. Rick is Brianna's boyfriend, they just started dating last month. Brianna doesn't want to admitt that she had a crush on Ric for forever, but I always knew they would get together.

" Jacob is working he couldn't make it tonight." Makenzie says.

"Rick is outside with CJ probably funneling beer." Brianna says,

" Well lets go join the party, I didn't come to talk. I came to get wasted!" I say making my way outside.

~. ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~

After about five shots of Tequila and a couple of beers I am absolutely shit faced. Stumbling around trying to find Jasper I walk back inside. I haven't seen him since we got to the party. Leaning against the kitchen counter I try to call him three times, but everytime it goes to voicemail. Wandering upstairs to continue my search, I walk down the hallway assuming Jasper was in one of these rooms.

"Jasper.... JASPER!" I whisper yell trying to find him.

Passing by one of the rooms the door was open and there were voices saying something.

"Oh fuck , yes right there just like that... oh YES!" I hear a girl moaning.

Not thinking, I peek my head in to see who the voices belonged to. As soon as I saw who it was I regretted my decision. What I saw was Jasper fucking the schools biggest whore, Veronica, doggie style. Stunned at the sight before me I just stand there feeling empty.

Jasper finally notices me when I clear my throat. Hurriedly stopping his actions, Jasper turns to look at me with horror.

" Jade.. uh it's not what it looks like. I didn't mean for this to happen." Jasper says putting his pants on.

" So she just somehow ended up falling on your dick?" I ask. Does he really think I'm that stupid?

" It was a mistake I swear. It will never happen again I love you." He says coming to stand infront of me trying to hold my hand.

I knew he was full of shit. I really wished I listened to my friends.

Pulling away from him, I slap him with all my might. "Don't ever talk to me, look at me, or touch me again." I say turning around slamming the bedroom door.

~End Flashback ~

" Is everything okay Jade?" my mom asks, snapping me out of my haunting thoughts.

"Yeah, mom I'm fine," I say with a fake smile. She seemed to believe me and not push the question any further. I almost believed myself until I felt a slight pang of sadness. My mom didn't know about Jasper's sexual adventure and I wanted to keep it that way.

Feeling the tears press at the corners of my eyes, I dig my headphones out of my backpack. At that moment I make a promise to myself that I won't cry anymore, I will be strong and get over that douche. As I listen to the music lyrics, I close my eyes and drift off to sleep; Not noticing the stray tears roll down my cheeks betraying the promise I made.

~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~

" Jade....... Jade wake up we are here." I hear my mom say.

" Mhmmmmm...... five more minutes." I say turning away from her voice.

" JADE WAKE UP!!!!"

Startled, I quickly sit up to see my mom's frustrated face.

" Dang mom I was asleep not dead." I say rubbing my sleepy eyes.

" Well it sure did seem like it. Now hurry up so we can go to the beach. You know how much I love it here." She says, full of excitement.

My mom does love it here I mean LOVES. She has already planned for us to move to Florida after I graduate, which is only one year from now.

You're probably wondering where my father is. Well, my father and mother didn't get married so when I was born he didn't stick around. So it's just me and my mom which I really don't mind. My mom is everything and I wouldn't trade her for the world.

Getting out of the car and grabbing our luggage, we check into our hotel room and get ready for the beach.

~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~

As usual, the beach is full of people. Finding a spot in the crowded sand, me and my mom set up our tent. Afterwards I pull my brown shoulder length hair into a ponytail. I apply sunscreen so I won't get burnt too bad. I am a light tan color already, but I tan really easily and get a sunburn no matter how much sunscreen I put on. 

Laying underneath the sun, I start to think about Jasper. I don't miss him, I think it was just nice to have someone to call yours. Was I not good enough for him? Did I not try enough? Maybe it was my fault he cheated on me. If I gave him what he wanted he wouldn't have to go to someone else to get it.

Shaking my head I knew that that was ridiculous. He cheated on me he is the one who ruined the relationship. There was nothing I could do if sex was his only reason for being with me. I just wish we never met.

After about two hours of me laying on the sand letting my thoughts put me in an even shitter mood, mom and I head back to the hotel.

I take a long shower and lay down, hoping sleep will quickly wash over me and ease the emptiness deep within my chest.