Isolation. Phan

Chapter 11

Dan woke up the next day to find the house was empty- even Phil's bedroom. His covers were messily left on his bed, his pyjamas discarded on the floor. Dan instantaneously frowned, running for his phone and dialling Phil's number with shaky hands. Anxiety was making his stomach ache and his whole body tremble. When it went straight to voicemail, Dan let out a loud cry. He clicked into PJ's contact, trying his best to think reasonable thoughts.

"PJ!" Dan gasped as soon as he heard his friend's voice. "Phil is gone. He's not at home!"

"Calm down!" He said, swallowing thickly as he contemplated what to say. "Maybe he just went for a walk or something?"

"He hasn't left the house since we got back from tour, why now? Something must have happened... His phone is turned off too. I don't know what to do Peej!" Dan let out another fragile wail, tears falling down his cheeks so rapidly that they were blurred.

"Don't panic just yet.. Leave it a few hours and see if he comes home. I'm sure it's fine."

"What am I meant to do to distract myself until then?"

"I don't know? I'd come over but I am really really busy with my new video. Keep me updated, okay?"

"O-Okay." Dan then hung up. His feet were still glued in the doorway of Phil's room as he brokenly looked at all his belongings. He unstuck his feet from the floor and sat down on his best friend's bed. He lifted up Lion from where he was kept on Phil's side and clutched him tightly. "Please be okay." He mumbled to the little lion.

-

The door closed and Phil slowly walked up to his room, hoping Dan wasn't around to ask him questions. He pushed open his bedroom door and he couldn't help but gasp when he saw his friend wrapped up in his covers, cuddling his favourite stuffed lion. Dan looked exhausted... was that his fault? His fault for being so sad?

Dan rubbed his eyes, yawning as he sat up. "Where'd you go? You worried me sick. I thought you were going to do something bad." Dan simply said, his voice and expression unreadable.

"I went to the doctors, Dan. They're going to help me get better." Phil mumbled, looking into his friend's eyes as his face lit up.

"Really?" When Phil nodded, Dan tackled him into a warm hug which basically screamed I'm so proud of you.

-

@/OliviaCopeland_12: You probably won't see this because I'm sure loads of people DM you all the time on Twitter. I mean, you are Dan Howell! I just wanted to ask if you were okay? I bumped into Noah yesterday in town and he looked kind of.. I don't know.. messed up? Did something happen? Sorry it has been so long.

@/Danisnotonfire: It's okay. Sorry I haven't messaged you either. Phil broke up with Noah because of what happened. I guess I'm okay but Phil definitely isn't.

@/OliviaCopeland_12: Oh. I don't really know what to say? Other than look after him.

@/OliviaCopeland_12: ...Is he depressed?

@/Danisnotonfire: Yes. It's bad. He went to see a doctor about it the other day but he never told me what they said.

@/OliviaCopeland_12: Give him a hug for me? I wish I could help.

@/Danisnotonfire: I will.

-

A week or so later, Dan woke up to another empty house. Phil wasn't home but, this time, he didn't panic. He just assumed he was with the doctor again which would actually be a very good thing. Dan just sat down in front of the TV and started to watch some anime (he made sure to choose one that Phil didn't like so he didn't miss any).

-

A couple of hours later, Phil walked in the door and smiled softly at his friend. Dan was quick to smile back, realising that Phil's smile actually looked... genuine. "Where have you been?" Dan asked, turning off the TV so he could focus all of his attention on his friend.

"My doctor recommended a therapist so I thought I'd give her a try." Phil said, looking down at the floor, slightly embarrassed.

"How was it? Did it help?"

"Well.. she just made me tell her about my problems but she let me take my time. She was really nice."

"That's brilliant! I'm so proud of you!" Dan stood up and wrapped his arms around Phil. Both were smiling more than they had in a while.