the 19th Hunger Games

Chapter 10

My dreams were no more than blurs and hazes, flashing colours and vague sounds. But in the midst of all that, there was a patch of silence, a small spot radiating peace. I tried reaching it all the time but it was like a wall was pulled up between me and that one place. Every time I tried focussing on it, it faded away like a ghost.

   I woke up feeling uneasy and my mind was haunted by my dreams. I snapped at everyone in the morning and felt wired and drained in the afternoon. I was no use to anyone and kept to myself in the fort. Like this a few days past, I’m not even sure how many. During those days of feeling unsure and on edge my leg healed up pretty fine and slowly the blisters turned into normal wounds and then flattened themselves on my skin in the form of thin, white scars. After about a week or two I was back into shape and out there hunting for food, berries and fresh water. The forest appeared to be a source of pure luxury and delight. In those two weeks our group lacked nothing and days passed by without any deaths. The careers appeared to stick to themselves, the girl from 9 wasn’t heard of and we just lived like we’d always done this. For a time it was easy to pretend that this would never end and none of us wanted it to end either. We had fun, we tanned in the sunlight easily breaking through the trees, we bathed in the creek near our hide out and we ate as much as our bellies could hold, growing stronger day by day. Still, in silence we prepared for the end to come. None of us mentioned it out loud but at noon we’d all go our separate ways to train on our own. Every day I sprinted through the forest getting quicker and more agile, training my stamina and endurance. After running I’d find my favourite tree and do pull ups until I couldn’t feel my arms anymore and then hang from a branch up side down and do sit ups. In the time after my recovery I grew so strong sometimes I scared myself. But I knew that if I wanted to get Oscar out alive I needed every bit of strength I could get. All of us where training and I could see every single one of them become more buff and radiant of power. The final battle would be so spectacular the Capitol wouldn’t forget it any time soon. And I was sure the careers hadn’t been doing nothing either. If they had, the Gamemakers would’ve driven us together already. I wondered what was going on. Surely our happy lives weren’t interesting enough to give us about two weeks of utter piece. I tried figuring out what they had to be thinking but failed. Well, we’d find out soon enough.

   Soon means really soon. It wasn’t even 24 hours when the message reached my ears, not 24 hours. And that was much, much too soon. I wasn’t ready to leave my happy place. I wasn’t ready to see people die. But the Capitol had decided that I was, or they just really badly wanted to see blood. Goodness did I hate them.

“Attention tributes, attention! Tomorrow the odds might well be very much in your favour!” The Capitol accent was strong in this one. “Hereby I announce you tomorrow there will be a feast. Two of you need something desperately but for the others, this feast might be a chance to win. Even if not, you will not leave empty handed. Find your way back to the cornucopia, tributes. Tomorrow, starting at sunrise.” I was on my own in the forest when I heard it and I swear my heart skipped a beat, maybe even two. Without further hesitation I started running in the direction of our camp but halfway Lan and I nearly collided as out of the blue he cam crashing through the dense woods.

“Xan!” he breathed.

“Lan!” I collapsed against is broad chest and wrapped my arms around his waist. His hands rested on my back, strong arms tight around me. Some part of me was scared he’d crush me to death and then would kill Oscar but I ignored it. “This is it,” I whispered. I was scared to death. The oldest in the arena but probably the one closest to just dying of fear. And this time, it wasn’t just because I was afraid I’d lose Oscar. This time I realised the chance of me dying was huge. Like, absurdly huge. Huge, elephant like. Unable to be ignored whatsoever. The idea of dying, of losing my life, having to face the unknown, or maybe the lack of it, grasped me and made me catch my breath, choking me. I wasn’t the only one having a heard time. His face was buried into my shirt and through the fabric I could feel his mouth open and close like a fish out of the water.