I'm Sorry (Joshler)

Part 3

The day of the funeral:

Tyler missed his family more than words could even begin to describe, nobody else listened to him, everybody hated him. He got shoved into lockers, called a fag and sometimes got beat up after school. The only people he had were his family. Now he didn't even have them.

It was noon and it was a damp, foggy day. Tyler thought the weather reflected how he felt himself... depressed. He always had been but today he just truly wanted to sleep and never wake up. Nobody understood him. Nobody loved him anymore.

When it was time for the eulogy, Tyler stood up, visibly shaking. He hated public speaking, which came as no surprise since he would often get shouted abuse at; he hated how cruel people were. But he pondered on anyway because this was for his family and he would do just about anything for them.

"M-my family. T-they were my whole l-life". Tyler began. "Words could not e-even begin to d-describe how much they meant to me. My mum, s-she was like my guardian angel, her voice smile could light up a whole room." Tyler said, getting more confident now. "God damn, her smile could even make the sun jealous of how bright it was. When I cried, she offered me her shoulder, when I laughed she offered me her smile. When I loved or hated, she still loved me unconditionally and I wish I had appreciated that more whilst I could".

He continued to give a eulogy about his other four deceased family members and gradually the rain ceased and the sun burst through a hole in the clouds, but the sky darkened up pretty quickly.

A day later and the thoughts still hadn't disappeared. Die. Die. Die. Well it was certain Tyler didn't want to live anymore.

He stood on the edge of the cliff face looking down. It was a clear day, no clouds, no noise, no anything. A quite Sunday. The sky was a beautiful shade of sunset red. Perfect Tyler thought to himself. He always came up here on a Sunday, always with the same intentions. It never happened though. But today he hoped it would.

Now he was a scrawny, skinny boy. Understandable considering his eating disorder. He hated food, it kept him alive, and he didn't want that, he didn't want that at all. He had many problems did Ty, his pain and struggles all written on the lines on his wrists, up his arms, his back, his legs, everywhere.

Today was the day Tyler decided to himself. He took a deep intake of air, bent his knees, spread his arms and-

"WAIT" Screamed a boy. He was quite a bit shorter than Tyler and had dark blue hair. His eyes were striking but blazing with fear and pain at the sight of the other boy with his arms spread out. "NOT YET" He screamed.

"D-don't come near me" Tyler choked. "I w-want to do this, you can't stop me".
"I'm not... well I want to... but i came here with the same intentions".
They both looked down in silence.

After a while the boy said cautiously "I'm josh by the way".
"Tyler."
"So... why are you up here Tyler."
"My family perished in a fire and i have no one else and i used to come here every Sunday anyway, contemplating the same thing."
"Oh god Tyler I'm so sorry."
"Not your fault Josh, so what about you?"
"I'm... I'm abused, physically and mentally, and the bullying doesn't help much neither."
"Oh god, I'm so sorry Josh, nobody should have to go through that. Please, don't jump. You don't have to. Tell the authorities Josh, save yourself."
"Ty, I know but my parents will just get there revenge they will make up some bullshit story on how im just a naive boy with a run away mind."
"Josh..."
"Ty... you don't have to jump"
"I told you, don't try to stop me"
"I know sorry."

"It was good to meet you though Josh, it has been... nice to have a friend. I felt closer to you in just a few minutes than to any other person before." He instantly regretted saying this, he just hoped that the ground would swallow him whole, well it would in a minute anyway.
"Ty... I feel the same way completely"

The two boys held hands and bent there knees, when all of a sudden everything went black for Tyler. He collapsed to the ground, and josh caught him just before he fell. "I guess this is a sign Ty, my parents are away, I'll take you to my house for the night." He whispered soothingly to Tyler, despite knowing that he wouldn't be able to hear him.

It sounded bad, but he was glad Tyler collapsed, he knew he wouldn't have had it in him knowing that Tyler would die. He was special.