Only When It's Too Late

Part 1

Meeting one person so perfect and flawless in your eyes is not a common occurrence. In fact, it's quite rare. Putting that person before your social life and status should be easy and not require any hesitation...why is it so hard for me? I'm selfish. I know. But this is high school, this is how it's supposed to be, right? You're supposed to have a drama filled life and go to parties and make mistakes and not tie yourself down and such...you're not supposed to have fallen in love. At least not like this. It's not supposed to feel like guilt weighing on your chest everyday and night, barely allowing you to breathe or clear your mind.

The vibrating notification on my phone pulls me out of my daze. I don't have to check it, I already know it's my friend asking me to meet up and go to a party. But what he doesn't know-or probably would even care about is that today is a very special day for me. Something that can't be put off for some junior/senior party at the quarterback's house. Today is the day of a funeral for someone I cared deeply about. An ending that impacted everyone close to her so terribly and drastically since her presence always brought light to everyone's mood no matter the emotions they were feeling prior to - or at least everyone who gave enough cares to actually get to know her. Dying so young...at the hands of careless drunk drivers. It isn't fair. 

Shivering from the sharp daggers of rain drops pelting at my body, I am more than happy to see the bus coming up from down the street finally arriving, seven minutes late to its stop. Today is such a tragic day even the heavens weep and bawl and everyone walks around with much more gloom and detest than any of them usually do. I board the bus and sit toward the middle where no one is to avoid any uncomfortably friendly small-talk with strangers.