Stiletto Sisterhood

Original Edition: Six | Your Power

A mother and daughter wake up one morning to discover they've switched bodies. You know the Movie. I can guarantee almost everyone does. A fun, cute comedy that makes everyone laugh. Except me.

I couldn't laugh because I know that fear. That terror. I lived it every single day, being trapped in a body that isn't yours. Wondering if you'd ever break free.

Except with a movie you know in the end everything will be fine. They'll return to themselves and be the person they we're always meant to be.

The same can't be said of real life. There are no certainties. No guarantees.

All that movie did was create a senseless barrage of hope and longing for something I didn't know could ever be possible.

I was four when I...knew. I'd cry and cry whenever my mom would slip me into jeans and every trip for a haircut resulted in me screaming so hard I'd be sick. Most parents would've brushed off my antics as tantrums. Behavioral issues that I would either outgrown or met with disciplinary action, but mine didn't.

They'd heard me. They'd listened. I had no idea how lucky I was until I'd grown much older.

Though, sometimes, when my father didn't know I was looking, I saw the echoes of disappointment. Of regret. And fear. There was a lot to be afraid of.

When the days were darkest and my soul a broken mess, I closed my eyes and saw myself as I was--barely fourteen, standing in the kitchen and holding a chef's knife. Fantasizing about slicing it over my skin. Carving into my body. So that the real me could emerge. As I was meant to be, not as I was.

Bloody and raw, but me.

All births are supposed to be painful and messy. My own would prove to be no different. It's a process, a journey, and still a long way from complete, but I'm happier because of it. So if there's anything I can say it's this:

Never hide behind someone else's mask, and let being you--your purest self--become your power.